Counselling: A Map for Emotional Wellbeing

Overview

Much disappointment results from either our attempts at living by others’ expectations or hoping that they must live up to ours

What is Emotional wellbeing?
Emotional wellbeing refers to more than the mere absence of depression, anxiety or other diagnosable psychological disorders. Rather it is the presence of qualities that allow us to create for ourselves the best possible life.

Emotional wellbeing requires the ability to develop and maintain healthy relationships, ability to deal with uncertainty and adapt to the changes in one’s life.

Emotionally healthy individuals have the ability to feel, express and manage a range of positive and negative emotions.

Negative emotions that are often seen to impede our wellness, can, in fact, be seen as a warning signal that serves the purpose of bringing our attention to the ineffective methods we are using to deal with important issues in our lives.

Suppressing or staying overly focused on negative emotions cause negative consequences in our relationships, work, finances and even physical health.

Our emotional wellbeing/psychological health are closely connected to our life experiences, our innate temperament and our personality.

Early childhood experiences are especially significant since it is these that teach us the “acceptable” norms of behaviour, thoughts, feelings and relationships. That is, we develop the “right” ways of being by witnessing our caregivers in action. We carry these images in our psyche that serve as templates for processing and defining later behaviours, thoughts, feelings and relationships with others.

Can we change these templates and form new, more adaptive ones?

YES, Counselling is a map to emotional well being where a qualified professional assists in reflecting on our emotional baggage and bring to our awareness those emotional wounds of our childhood that may insidiously cause us to repeat the same cycle. Counselling helps break the template and in learning more effective ways of being. 

Can counselling help me change my parents, my boss, my children.....?
No and Yes.

No, because as articulated well by Eckhart Tolle, "The world can only change from within."
Yes, because when we change our reaction to others, they automatically change their behaviours.

Do I have to change my thoughts?
Yes and No.

Yes, as said very wisely by Epictetus (Greek Philosopher-1^st century A.D.) that, “People are disturbed not by things, by the view which they take of them”

No, Counselling is a map to emotional well being where the counsellor helps clarify thoughts and negative emotions that hinder our view to the possible available alternative opportunities such that change and personal growth are facilitated.

What is Psychological Counselling?
Psychological Counselling is a process designed to assist people caught in the problems of everyday living. It is an interaction between a therapist and a client that leads to changes from less to more adaptive state of thoughts, feelings and behaviour. Also sometimes known as psychotherapy or talk therapy, it heals emotional distress by psychological method

Psychological counselling is an avenue to learn to regulate our emotions and dysfunctional thoughts to bring positive changes. However, it takes much courage to address personal problems and painful personal stories.

I offer:

• Individual therapy/counselling
• Marriage/Couple/Relationship therapy/counselling
•  Family therapy/Counselling

What is Individual Counselling?

It is counselling, a collaborative process in which a unique, confidential helping relationship is developed between a counsellor and an individual, the client

What is Marriage/Couple Counselling?

It is counselling, a collaborative process to help understand and resolve conflicts and improve relationship between the partners. Often it brings to the surface one partner’s extreme need to control, or one partner’s extreme need for validation or fear of rejection or an inability to ‘see’the other’s perspective.

Marriage counselling gives couples the tools to communicate better, negotiate changes, resolve conflicts and even argue in a healthier way. Marriage counseling can be very helpful even if your partner does not want to come.

What is Family Therapy/Counselling?

It is counselling, a collaborative process where the focus is on relationships within the family unit. Ideally it takes place with family members present.

Family therapy may be the primary focus of treatment, or it could be used as a supplement to individual therapy.