Is your relationship suffering, or are you dealing with the issues constructively? Working together during hard times can actually strengthen your relationship, as it does any successful business.



The following guidelines will help you maintain a healthy, strong, partnership.

1. Avoid Blame. Pointing your finger at others or yourself will only hurt everyone involved. Fear based anger and guilt feelings increase your fears, create more problems, and do not resolve anything.

Suggestion: Accept the situation. When you accept what happened, you are calmer and you can begin to deal with the issues constructively. Ask yourselves what you can learn from the experience, so that you can prevent it from happening again.

2. Avoid taking the situation personally. Lose of money and things do not mean that you are not smart, good enough, a good provider, household manager, etc.

Suggestion: Realize that the situation is outside of you, and no matter what happens you are smart, good enough, a good provider, etc.

3) Avoid becoming depressed or not dealing with it. Under depression is anger, and, under anger, is fear, hurt, or powerlessness.

Suggestion: Deal with your anger constructively by hitting a pillow and saying what you are angry about. Then, acknowledge your underlying feelings and focus on what you can do to improve the situation to help you feel more powerful.

4) Avoid dealing with the problems alone. You are likely to feel resentment, if you feel you are carrying the burden alone.

Suggestion: It is important for everyone involved to work together on solutions. Uncover positive actions by writing the problem as a question on a piece of paper and brainstorm solutions. For example, the question could be, ?How can we create more money to have what we need and desire??

5) Avoid worrying and focusing only on the problem. What you focus on is what you will intensify in your life.

Suggestion: Focus on the positive solutions. Talk often about what you are grateful for and how you can still have fun and enjoy the simple, inexpensive things in life.

In summary, there are positive actions that can help you keep your relationship strong during tough economic times. Open to your creativity and you may be surprised at some of your unique solutions. Remember the well known saying, ?Necessity is the cause of inventions.? If the children are old enough, include them in the problem solving. They can come up with some very unique ideas. What a gift it is to teach them positive ways to deal with problems. Ask others for help if you need it, and keep your trust and faith that the situation will improve.