Separating permanently from your spouse has some huge implications for your lifestyle. The family as you know it ceases to exist. It disintegrates and no longer functions as one unit. You or your spouse has to move out of the house and look for another accommodation. The emotional support and nurturing as well as the feeling of security you used to derive from your family are abruptly withdrawn.



You are single again and no longer have a sympathetic shoulder to lean on. You also have to sever relations with your spouse's relatives with whom you may have established a good friendship over the years. Many divorced people undergo tremendous stress and anxiety and suffer from various psychological problems such as a guilt complex or raging anger. Often, it becomes necessary for them to take the help of a counsellor or psychiatrist to get rid of their negative emotions.

Adding to this are the financial woes. Your income dips and becomes half with divorce because you no longer have any right to your spouse's finances. It is common for many women, especially single mothers, to slip below the poverty line after divorce as they are unable to meet essential expenses such as house rent and school fees of the kids.

Obviously, divorce is not a child's play because it can alter your life radically. Once divorce has been granted, you cannot undo it and reclaim your family. So the decision to seek a divorce has to be taken with much thought, contemplation and a cool head. But before you are handed over the two decrees finalising your divorce by the court, there are many issues that have to be settled. These relate to three main areas: child custody, division of financial property and the maintenance to be paid.

When you divorce, the biggest question facing both of you is: ?With whom would the kids stay after divorce?? This is an emotionally charged issue because usually the parents are quite attached to their kids and would want to stay with them after divorce. If the kids live with the mother, then the father has to pay some amount to her regularly as maintenance toward their upkeep.

When the married partners live in a single home together, they buy many assets such as house, vehicles, jewellery, consumer electronics items, white goods and so on. They also incur debt such as mortgage, car loans and credit card bills. Who will get to keep what from the assets and who will have to take care of which debt, is another issue that has to be settled before divorce.

Settling these complex issues to the mutual satisfaction of both is not an easy matter for the partners. However, there are couples who do not have much acrimony with each other and want to part ways amicably. They manage to have a heart-to-heart discussion and thrash out all the issues. Once they have reached a conclusion ? with or without a counsellor's help ? there are many benefits. They avoid stress and tension that usually builds up before divorce. But most important of all, they can opt for a Do-It-Yourself (DIY) divorce which is quick, easy and dirt cheap.

In a DIY divorce, there is no need to hire a solicitor since there is no dispute that has to be solved. There are many companies offering DIY services online. What the partners have to do is visit any of these websites, buy an option that suits them and then download legal forms for printing on their home computer. Once they have completed and signed the forms, these have to be mailed to the DIY company. The latter's legal team deposits the documentation with the court. Once the court grants the two divorce decrees, these are then mailed to the partners, thus completing the process. The company's legal team offers hand-holding to the partners throughout, gives advice and provides clarifications.

However, if the partners are unable to come to a settlement on their own about the critical issues, then there is no option for them but to fight the case in the court. For this, it is advisable for them to hire a high-street solicitor who can represent their interests in front of the judge. The solicitors are duly qualified and bring with them a wealth of experience that can help you exploit every loophole and room for manoeuvre given in the law. However, the drawback is that most of the solicitors charge by the hour and this can add up to a tidy sum. However, for what is at stake ? child custody and division of family assets ? their services seem to be worth the price.