But do you want to know the real truth? The person who you should be isn't on the big screen...he's right in the front of the mirror! Yes, YOU! As much as you want to be George Clooney or Brad Pitt, women will see right through that fake exterior and will instantly be turned off.



Yes, that IS the truth. Women want you to be yourself, no one else. Women are very intuitive. They can tell when a guy is comfortable just being himself and when he is trying to pretend to be something that he is not. Being fake and pretentious is a BIG turn off to women.

So here are 4 steps being yourself around women:

1. Don't fake it. You wouldn't want her to, so why should you?

2. Embrace all your feelings, including nervousness and anxiety

3. Ask her questions, and LISTEN!

4. Use the "leapfrog" conversation technique

Those 4 steps don't look so hard, do they? Here's how to follow those steps to have a successful date, conversation, quick meeting, etc.

First off, just take a deep breath and calm down. There is no bigger turn off than a guy who is clutzy, stumbles over his words, and sweats like a pig. But given that, it's natural to feel a little anxiety around a woman you find attractive. If she didn't stir up any emotions, then you probably wouldn't be attracted to her in the first place, right?

So embrace every emotion that you are feeling, and use it to your advantage. When I say this, I mean to harness the power of those emotions and turn something negative into a positive. Don't focus on your anxiety, because that will only lead to you feeling more anxious. Instead, focus on how good she looks, how good you feel when you're around her, or what a cool restaurant you're in. That's what I mean by turning the negative energy into positive energy.

If you're a little nervous, it's no problem...some girls actually find it "cute" that you are so into them that you act a little nervous around them. It's a sign of flattery to them. And if you are still feeling a bit nervous and can't settle down, move on to the next step.

Start asking her questions. Women love to talk, and they love to talk about themselves. Ask her what she likes to do in her spare time. What are her favorite movies. What are her favorite restaurants? Keep the questions open-ended and make the conversation flow from one topic to another. Don't jump randomly across topics. This will only show her that you aren't listening or have memorized a script for the date. That's a no-no.

And asking her questions will give you the necessary time to settle down and feel more comfortable around her. If she's the one doing the talking, you can concentrate on feeling relaxed and simply listen to what she has to say, rather than stress out on filling the silence.

I love to use my "leapfrog" technique when talking to women. I'll start with a general question, like, "where did you grow up?" Then from there, I'll pull out some interesting, random facts about that town that I know, or just ask her what makes the town special.

From that point, I'll continue the conversation and move on to the next topic, but will always bridge some common ground from the last topic to the next thing we talk about. Basically, I leapfrog from one topic to another.

Doing this will allow the conversation to flow smoothly and feel very natural to the both of you. If you pay close attention to her, you can pick out little things about her that you can utilize later on in your conversations. So, be sure to LISTEN to what she says. It'll pay off later.

So just be natural and who you are. As you begin to practice the strategies above, your confidence levels will shoot up and you'll be comfortable in your own skin. Women not only observe that, but definitely appreciate the fact that they have met a genuinely good guy that isn't showing a fake exterior simply to get her in bed.

To summarize the steps from today's session:

1. Don't pretend to be someone else

2. Nervousness can be your friend, not your enemy

3. Ask questions, and LISTEN

4. "Leapfrog" from one topic to another

Until next installment, good luck with your attraction endeavors, and don't get sucked into thinking "that you need to be something that they want you to be"! Go Get 'em Tiger!