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Becoming A Surrogate Mother

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1.Its not easy

Unlike a typical pregnancy, there are many more hoops you need to jump through with surrogacy. More tests need to be done and multiples like twins and triplets are common. There will be more doctor's appointments, and someone else will need to be updated about everything that happens.

There is no privacy in surrogacy. Things you would normally only share with your spouse now needs to be shared with another couple.

You may be asked to postpone family vacations or holidays so that you do not deliver the baby or babies in the wrong hospital. Sacrifice will have to be make.

2.It doesn't always work

Surrogacy is very time consuming. If you are lucky, a shorter gestational surrogacy can take about a year.

On the other hand, if the medical procedures do not work the first time, you could go through three or four or more cycles, some several months apart, and have a journey last more than two years. Sometimes a surrogate mother does not get pregnant at all.

Since a surrogate mother typically does not receive her fees until she is pregnant, she should never depend on that money coming in. Often, it does not come in at all.

3.You'll need to give yourself shots

If you haven't found out this critical piece of gestational surrogacy information, then you need to do a lot more research before you do anything else. Gestational surrogacy requires shots.

A lot of them. You will be required to give yourself 1-3 shots daily, for more than three months. Some of these shots are little needles that resemble diabetic insulin shots, but most are the long, 2-3 inch syringes that are to be injected into the muscular part of your buttocks.

Your spouse can help you with this if possible. This part of gestational surrogacy is unpleasant, but completely necessary.

4.How do you feel about selective reduction?

Selective reduction happens when there are more than two fetuses. If you become pregnant with triplets, quadruplets, quintuplets or more, how would you feel if the doctors and intended parents wanted to "selectively reduce" aka abort some of the fetuses to get to just two?

It is important to note that you are still more than able to become a surrogate mother if you would not selectively reduce under any circumstances. It's just important to know that and find intended parents who feel the same way.

Multiples are very common in surrogacy. Do not assume it will not happen to you.

5.You need your own lawyer

If you become a surrogate mother, you will need to sign a contract. You need your own lawyer, not a shared lawyer with the intended parents.

The intended parents will pay for the cost of your attorney to look over your contract. This is in your best interest, as your attorney may find something that would inadvertently take advantage of you.

6.Set your own fees

No two surrogacy arrangements are alike, and the fees a surrogate receives are very personal, and vary completely. If you are considering becoming a surrogate mother, you need to research the different types of fees and see which ones are appropriate for your situation.

If you do not do this prior to finding intended parents, you may feel as though you are being taken advantage of later. Knowing what fees you are looking for also makes it easier to talk about money when the time comes.

Becoming A Surrogate Mother

I started to consider surrogacy five years after my last child was born. I had had a tubal ligation at her birth, and was under the mistaken impression that having my tubes tied was an automatic disqualification when it came to surrogacy.

Luckily, I could not have been more wrong. I have since delivered three children via surrogacy; twins and a singleton boy. So can women who have had their tubes tied become surrogates?

The short answer is yes, you can become a gestational carrier if you have had your tubes tied. But, unless you are willing to undergo surgery or an IVF procedure anyway, you cannot become a traditional surrogate mother if you have had a tubal ligation.

First, lets talk about the difference between gestational surrogacy and traditional surrogacy. Both are very common in the United States.

Gestational surrogacy is where the gestational carrier or surrogate mother will carry a baby she is not biologically related to. The eggs of the mother (or in some cases the eggs of an egg donor) and the sperm of the father are combined and implanted into the womb of the surrogate via an IVF procedure.

Since there is no biological connection to the child or children, there is no need for the surrogate mother's ovaries to be a factor in the situation at all. A woman with her tubes tied can easily and without question become a gestational carrier.

With traditional surrogacy, a surrogate is donating her eggs to the process. She is impregnated via artificial insemination with the sperm of the intended father, and is the biological mother of the surrogate baby.

Since her eggs are needed with traditional surrogacy, it is very difficult to proceed with this type of surrogate arrangement for those who have had a tubal ligation. It would be very expensive and time consuming.

The best option for those who have had their tubes tied is unquestionably gestational surrogacy. In fact, agencies, clinics and intended parents prefer a gestational carrier who has previously had a tubal ligation.

Why? Because there is virtually no chance that the surrogate mother will unintentionally become pregnant with her own child while cycling to become pregnant via IVF with the intended parent's child. Though rare, this does occur in some situations where surrogates who do not have their tubes tied break rules and regulations pertaining to embryo transfer.

So if you have had your tubes tied and are considering surrogacy, feel confident that not only will this not pose a problem, but you will be sought after as a gestational carrier.

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Rayven Perkins has sinced written about articles on various topics from Herpes Cure, Surrogacy and Pregnancy and Family Planning. Rayven Perkins is an author and two-time surrogate mother. To find out more information on surrogacy or how to become a traditional or gestational surrogate mother, please see her site. Rayven Perkins's top article generates over 450000 views. to your Favourites.

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