Real life is no different from reel life. If you are a victimised spouse, you would admit how subtle yet severe emotional abuse is. You would also agree that soliciting help is difficult, for people often belie its existence. In fact, even you, as a victim, might have taken long to recognise and give a name to this perverse behaviour of your spouse. Failure to identify emboldens abusers further.



Identification of Emotional Abuse

Emotional abuse can be identified, by how you (an injured spouse) feel. Are you constantly depressed or unhappy? Do you grapple with low self confidence? Or worse still, do you feel as if you are going crazy and toy with suicidal ideas? If you answer in the affirmative for either of this question then re think the circumstances that have induced such feelings. Your partner might have indulged in constant criticism or spoken something that has hurt deeply. Or your spouse might have closely monitored your movements and has isolated you, socially and financially.

Emotional abuse is so vast and varied that it is impossible to compile a list. Abusers indulge in such acts in an effort to control. So, in short, if your spouse indulges in dominating acts that depress you, then, it is emotional abuse. If you are trapped in such an abusive relationship, take all measures to protect yourself. Emotional abuse is cruelty. Some acts of emotional abuse are also illegal. It causes more harm than physical violence.

Impact of Emotional Violence

Physical violence hurts the body while emotional violence damages the mind. As a victim you might say that the agony penetrates down to the soul.

Such unhealthy acts of the marital partner damage your personality. Initially, you might have simply experienced fear. Abused people are known to change their behaviour to please their mate. This is the short term effect felt during the initial stages of abuse.

It is best if you succeed in recognising and terminating abuse at this juncture. The long term impacts of such violent behaviour are frightening in their severity. Subjugation to prolonged abuse ultimately erodes self confidence and induces stress related illness in the afflicted. Worse still, it develops suicidal tendencies, in some. Never endure such a relationship for long; search for solutions.

Solution to Abuse

There are two solutions, if you are trapped in such a relationship. You can contemplate distancing yourself from the offending partner. Or, you can put an end to the abuse. Either solution has to be adopted to protect yourself and your children from the long-term damages.

Stopping the abuser is difficult but not impossible. Confront your spouse. In all probability, such people resort to lying and deny any wrong doing. Be firm and let your partner know that you deserve to be treated with respect. Respect is the basis for any good relationship. Take concentrated steps at rebuilding your self esteem.

If your efforts fail then divorce is the only answer.

Emotional Abuse as a Ground for Divorce

Abuse of this form is an accepted ground for divorce for all residents of the UK. Emotional abuse can be categorised as domestic violence and statistics reveal that majority of the victimised spouses are women. (4 out of 10 women in the UK are subjected to domestic violence.)

You may be hesitant to seek a divorce for you might be jobless or have dependant children. Divorce might plunge you into financial difficulties. However, remember, that the safety of yours and your children takes precedence over difficulties. Also remember that children learn by example. When your children regularly witness abuse at home, they imitate similar patterns of behaviour. Do you want your children to grow up into abusers?

Self preservation is important. There are many sufferers of emotional abuse, who turn too weak to even protect themselves. They fail in the very first step of abuse identification, for it is extremely difficult to recognise such abuse. When you have realised that you are being emotionally abused, then either try to rectify your partner or terminate the marital relationship.