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How To Film Festival

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Back in the 80s there was a show called the "Canned Film Festival". The concept was simple. Show a film so bad that people would enjoy watching it. This idea was later expanded to "Mystery Science Theater" where not only the films were shown but dialogue and comments added to them which made the viewing even more hilarious. The original concept didn't last long. As a matter of fact, you could only see the "Canned Film Festival" in the summer of 1986. But it was long enough to see some of the worst movies ever made.



Like what?

Let's start off with the laughable "Robot Monster" said to be THE worst movie ever made right up there with another one that we'll review later. This movie is about an invasion from the Moon. A monster is sent to the Earth as an advance scouting party for the invasion. The monster is a gorilla in what looks like a Diver Dan diving suit by the name of Ro-Man. At one part of the movie when it appears that Ro-Man is starting to have feelings for the Earth girl, the leader from the moon asks him "Are you a ro-man or a hu-man?" Seeing this movie will leave you in stitches for hours. One of the most unintentionally funny science fictions of all time.

Then of course there was the cult classic "Plan 9 From Outer Space" which was about invaders from another planet hatching their "Plan 9" to infiltrate the government by sending zombies into it. Bela Lugosi died after just two days of production and the man they got to replace him was a head taller, looked nothing like him and spent the whole movie walking around with his cape in front of his face. Watch this and "Robot Monster" the same night. You'll be laughing until bed time.

Looking for more laughs? There's always "Bride Of The Monster" starring Bela Lugosi before he died. Of course, watching this movie you'd never know it. The plot is pretty simple Dr. Varnoff, played by Lugosi, captures twelve men for this experiment which involves turning them into supermen using atomic energy. Well, a newspaper woman by the name of Loretta King, played by Janet Lawton, gets too nosey for her own good and falls into the evil clutches of Varnoff. For the laughs, there's an octopus that in the end is strangling Varnoff. The problem with the scene is that it is obvious that Lugosi himself is actually wrapping the arms around himself. Then, if that isn't enough, as the good people escape, there is an atomic explosion and mushroom cloud no more than a few hundred yards away from them and yet they are not even touched by it. Just too funny for words.

The Canned Film Festival gave us many moments like these. And though the series itself only lasted that one summer, it made others realize that there was a market for really bad movies, a market that would suck in those who just couldn't get enough of them. Mystery Science Theater picked up where the festival left off. And while it was okay, it never really gave us what the original gave us. And for that we will always be grateful.
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