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How To Set Boundaries

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As parents, it can sometimes be a challenge to teach our children about boundaries. In their world, the world is all about them so teaching our kids how to respect ?the rules? and another person is vitally important. Teaching our children about boundaries is not only healthy, but will help set them up for success in relationships throughout their lifetime.



Below are some ideas in encouraging the learning of boundaries for kids:

1) Model healthy boundaries. Children learn more by what we DO than what we tell them to do. Act responsibly, ethically, and FOLLOW THE RULES throughout your own life in just the same way you would like your children to.

2) Make the rules you expect your children to follow clear and concise. Healthy boundaries for kids are dependent on this very step. If children are not sure of the rules and the standards of behavior that are expected, they'll have a difficult time learning about boundaries! Sit down and have a clear conversation with your children on exactly what you expect of them. It helps, especially with younger children, to have those rules clearly posted in a visible place where they can be reminded of them on a daily basis.

3) Make sure your children are aware of the consequences that will take place should they break a family rule. Just as healthy boundaries for kids is dependent on children understanding the ?rules?, it is just as important that they understand what will happen IF they decide to break a rule. When choosing a consequence for a behavior, make sure it is age appropriate AND appropriate for the offense, as well.

4) Be consistent and follow through with your expectations and consequences. If you decide a rule stands, it stands. You must, each and every time, mean what you say and say what you mean if you want your children to take you seriously. Your child must know that if they break a rule, the consequence WILL be enforced. Not all the whining in the world will change it!

5) Boundaries are dynamic and grow as the child grows. A long-standing family rule may need to evolve as your children grow and develop. For example: The standing family rule has always been that your child must hold your hand when they cross the street. That rule has always been enforced and worked great but now your child is 8. It's time for that rule to evolve and allow your child some independence!

It is our responsibility as parents to set boundaries for kids that are age-appropriate and appropriate for each personality and family lifestyle. Children thrive and feel secure when there are clear expectations and consequences if those expectations are defied. It will take a lot of time and effort, but remember that the children you are molding will be tomorrow's leaders. Teach your children to respect authority, treat others with kindness, and to respect another's boundaries and you'll have an adult who can change the world in wonderful ways!
How To Set Boundaries
At 2pm last Wednesday, I got a call from one of my clients. Before I could barely utter my "hello," she launched headlong into her story - "I am so frustrated! I have this client who has been dragging her feet at every stage of our project. I'm working on a branding campaign for her company and expected to be finished nine months ago, but every time we get to a stage in the project where the ball is in her court, I have to follow-up umpteen times and push and prod just to get her to move forward. In almost every case, it takes her about two months to do something that could have been done in a week. Then, two months later when she's finally finished with her part, she cheerily announces that she's ready for me to start the next phase and wonders how quickly I can do it. Every time this happens I have to completely reacquaint myself with her project. All in all, I've spent almost twice as many hours as I budgeted. How can I get her to wrap up this project so I can move on?," she finished.

I cannot think of one service business owner that hasn't faced this issue at one time or another. We all started our businesses concerned about providing great customer service and a quality service delivered on time. We thought that was the key to having happy clients. But, at some point, we find out that great customer service means that we're not allowing one client's delays to impact another client's project, the profitability of our business, or our own personal satisfaction. This is when we have to recognize that we are responsible for this situation. If you've allowed a client to run amuck dragging a project on forever, changing project parameters numerous times, delaying payment of the final bill, why shouldn't they continue to behave this way? It's up to you to put into place policies and procedures that communicate this to your clients and prospects from the very beginning.

One format I've seen used very effectively is a one-pager called "How We Work Together." It's a very basic document that outlines the responsibilities of both you and the client. It makes clear who is responsible for what and when so there are no questions later. It also outlines the consequences if either of you misses the target. Not only does this put the client on the straight-and-narrow, it shows them that you are willing to be held to high standards as well.

By using the How We Work Together document, you can begin setting the stage for productive client relationships from your very first contact with a new prospect. During your first meeting, give them a copy of the document and go through it with them. When I ran my web development company, mine included a rough timeline for each stage of the project and described how the responsibility shifted from me to them and back again throughout the process. It also included a description of consequences should particular stages of the project go beyond the timeline by a specified amount of time. This applied to me as well as them. People like to know what to expect. It left them feeling that I had a system I followed and could be relied upon to do what I was proposing to do. I feel confident that this is one of the reasons I got 90% of the projects I pitched.

I used the How We Work Together document again once I had received the signed contract and deposit payment. At that point, I would consult my project calendar and assign specific dates to each stage of the project included on the document and mail it out to the client. They had already seen the document once, so it wasn't new to them. Now, they just reviewed the dates and used it as a follow-up tool.

If you are currently in a similar situation, handle it as best you can in order to preserve the client relationship and introduce the How We Work Together document at the beginning of the next project with this client. To begin to set boundaries with all of your clients and prospects, create your own How We Work Together document and utilize it in every new project for new and existing clients. You can see an example of one I helped a client write at: http://www.askthebizcoach.com/freebiesignupform.htm

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Kimberly Stevens is a business coach who works with business owners who want it all – a joyful personal life and a meaningful and profitable business. Her web site http://www.askthebizcoach.com offers weekly TeleTalks on business topics, a discussion board, business assessments tools, and an ezine addressing business challenges from a more personal angle.
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Both Emily Watson & Kimberly Stevens are contributors for EditorialToday. The above articles have been edited for relevancy and timeliness. All write-ups, reviews, tips and guides published by EditorialToday.com and its partners or affiliates are for informational purposes only. They should not be used for any legal or any other type of advice. We do not endorse any author, contributor, writer or article posted by our team.

Emily Watson has sinced written about articles on various topics from Parenting, Acupuncture Chiropractor and Parenting. Get Your Free Report On 16 Proven Ways To Motivate Your Child To Do Better In School...Plus, receive a "Live Demonstration Inside Our Unique 1 On 1 Online Classroom." Go to. Emily Watson's top article generates over 33100 views. to your Favourites.

Kimberly Stevens has sinced written about articles on various topics from Parenting. Kimberly Stevens is a business coach who works with business owners who want it all – a joyful personal life and a meaningful and profitable business. Her web site http://www.askthebizcoach.com offers weekly TeleTalks on business topics, a discussion boar. Kimberly Stevens's top article generates over 2400 views. to your Favourites.
Chicken And Foot Massage
Look to the Internet to find quick instruction on how to properly massage the feet there are also a number of spas that give classes on massage where you can learn to treat someone you love to a mom...
 
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