However, that strategy ensures that you will be overlooked by most women. Why? Because women love a man who can talk to them, understand them and connect with them - while also being able to add in humor and flirting.
As a man, it is always your responsiblity to lead conversations toward connecting on a deeper level. Here's a recent example of how I used this approach on a waitress...
I'd already sparked strong attraction with flirting and playful cockiness, so I started to ask some questions to get to know a little more about her. Notice how I make genuine statements to encourage more open and emotional responses from her:
Me: So how was your Saturday?
Her: Not bad, I slept in.
Me: *Laughing quietly, nodding to myself and smiling*...out partying last night?
Her: No I was working here until 3am.
Me: Nice...okay, so tell me - what do you do for fun during the week?
Her: Umm...well, I'm learning two languages.
This is where I switched to a deeper, more meaningful conversation that allowed the waitress and I to connect.
Me: Now that's interesting...learning one language is hard enough, but two? Geez...I love the idea of learning another language...what languages are you learning?
Her: French and Italian.
Me: Awesome...French is such a sexy language and Italian - such rich culture y'know. When I think of Italy I think of tasty, tasty cooking...mmm...so, why did you choose those two languages?
Her: Exactly that! I just love the cultures there...
Me: I can totally relate...I've always wanted to learn Japanese because when I think of Japan I think: Quality food, quality technology, quality culture, quality landscapes, quality people...it's just quality.
She went on to explain her deep feelings behind wanting to learn French and Italian.
Talking From Your Perspective: The conversation technique of 'talking from your perspective' is one of the easiest and most effective ways to connect with women on a deep rapport level.
Notice how I talked from my perspective in the previous example. One key aspect to success with this conversatiol technique is to often end it with a question.
Not always, because sometimes a woman will be so interested in the conversation that she will volunteer her commentary without you having to prompt her.
Here are some examples of how to talk to women, by talking from your perspective and ending your comments with a question.
You: I really love the beach on summer nights. Especially that point in the night where people start to feel calmer and more relaxed by the fresh change in the breeze... when it comes in so noticeably after a long, hot day. I love that. Have you ever gone to the beach at that time of night?
Or:
You: I don't like this restaurant. The chairs here are pretty crappy and those paintings are awful. It's like this place is stuck in a time warp. I like the food though... I should hire one of the chefs to cook for me.
Or:
You: I reckon bourbon sucks... scotch whiskey has a much more refined taste. It dances on your mouth... like a naked ballerina or something. What's your favorite drink?
Or:
You (to a male friend): Hey man, you're late again. I don't like it when you disrespect my time like that...anyway, let's go get that coffee. How was your drive over here?
Have you noticed the common element of each example so far? I've included the word "I" and I am talking about what I like/dislike/find interesting, etc.
Instead of saying, "This bar is good," say "I like this bar...the people here are cool."
Instead of saying, "The weather is nice today," say "I like this kind of weather. Reminds me of ______"
If you talk from your perspective, you'll notice that people will open up a lot easier when interacting with you. Why? It shows that you are comfortable expressing yourself and are not talking to them like a stranger would.
Well, I hope you've enjoyed this article on how to talk to women. Put some of the techniques into practice and see where it leads you.
How To Talk To Women
In the book 'How to Win Friends and Influence People,' Dale Carnegie talks about making other people feel important by gearing conversations toward their interests and strengths.
While this is a favorable social skill to employ, don't confuse it with being agreeable and pretending to like everything that a person is interested in/talking about.
Women naturally feel more comfortable in the presence of a guy who is assertive, doesn't hesitate and doesn't seek approval for his thoughts or actions. For example:
Woman: I went to Paris last year for the first time. My best friend Jenny came with me...it was so scary being in a big city and not being able to speak the language.
There are a number of ways to respond to what she just said. Here are two examples that show you weren't listening:
- Oh, that's nice.
- Oh right, so did you have fun?
If you were listening, you would have noticed at least three main conversation threads to open. If you want to have good conversations when you talk to women, then you'll need to start paying attention to what women actually say. Allow me to explain...
1. It was her first time in Paris.
Statements you could make or ways you could talk from your perspective:
- Start daydreaming and say something like, "Hmmm, Paris" in a really reflective way. Look away for about two seconds as you imagine Paris and gather your feelings about it.
"When I think of Paris, I picture the old streets with beautiful architecture...the alluring aromas of freshly-ground coffee and warm croissants... high fashion... lifestyle... ahh, I have to go there one day. Tell me about your experience with Paris - did you ever walk the streets in the morning and just say wow, I'm in Paris!?"
- I would love to go to Paris! The idea of going there makes me think about mystery, romance (said in a serious, seductive tone)... and Eiffel Towers (said in a sarcastic, humorous way)!
Questionss you could ask:
- What drew you to Paris?
- How did it feel when you first walked the streets of Paris?
- What was the most exciting things about Paris for you?
- Is it true what they say about people in Paris being snobby and rude?
2. She was traveling with her best friend.
Statements you could make or ways you could talk from your perspective:
- Traveling with a best friend... definitely a cool way to do it. I prefer traveling with someone as well because you get to share the experiences.
I have friends who've traveled by themselves before, they said they loved the strange feelings they got...saying it was like being a star in their own movie or something.
- Awesome...traveling is so much cooler when you have a close friend with you.
- I like traveling with someone, but once I went to Spain by myself for two weeks, it was so cool. Like you in Paris, I totally didn't know the language! Can you speak French now?
Questions you could ask:
- Did you guys travel anywhere else?
- Did you stick together for the whole trip, or did you have a huge fight over a hairdryer or something?
- How long have you guys been best friends?
- Is your best friend here tonight?
- Why do you call her your 'best friend'? What makes her the best?
3. She didn't know the language.
Statements you could make or ways you could talk from your perspective:
- Awesome - say something in French for me!
- "Bonjour Mademoiselle, je mappelle _____ (insert your name)." This translates into to "Good day Miss, my name is ________."
Questions you could ask:
- Can you speak any French these days?
- What's the weirdest thing you can say in French?
- Do many people speak English there?
Use these techniques to improve your conversations with women and remember: A big part of understanding how to talk to women is listening. It's easy to do, but most guys just overlook it.
Dan Bacon has sinced written about articles on various topics from Dating and Romance, Body Language and Dating and Romance. Dan Bacon is the CEO of TheModernMan.com who provide dating advice for men.. Dan Bacon's top article generates over 22200 views. to your Favourites.
Cool Four Letter Words My point with this article was to illustrate that just because you are on a diet it does not mean you cant treat yourself to some junk food once in a while, as long as you dont go crazy