To help you progress to achieve a wonderful goal, your dream job, you need to know that there are three ingredients in the cake of your life, almost all of which you had little personal influence over. Until now.



1) It's In The Genes

When you started off as a baby you had all your development to do - an empty vessel just waiting for life's experiences.

Your genes gave you certain characteristics; skills; talents and potential. Look at you father, your mother. Take a look at your brothers and sisters. Some things are similar and others very different.

Your genes have some impact. You are, up to a point, who you are and what is much more important, is what happens next.

2) Family Eh?

So, as a baby you had certain characteristics 'built in' and you soon started to experience life in ways that influenced you for ever. They started, experts would say, even before you left the womb - and from that moment on, you have been shaped through experiences much more than the genetic map you started out with.

Of course, the main impact is due to your parents. Day after day, when you were in the company of someone you looked up to for protection, nourishment and 101 other things, you were drip-by-drip, changed from the innocent blank sheet of paper where you started out.

Naturally as you learned, you reflected your parents in your behaviors, attitudes and thinking in all the important areas of your life. You found a position in the family pack, whether you have several or no siblings (that makes a difference too!).

So, your shaping started before you knew it and was something you had no control over. It wasn't wilfully 'done to' you. It just happened - and it had a massive influence on you and your role in life.

3) And Everything Else Too

Throw in a portion of schoolteachers, not to mention other children and by the time you reached your teens, your true nature and values were coated over with a veneer of life's experiences, both good and bad.

And at that point of decision, help arrives in the shape of careers counsellors, assessment tests, various books and computer programmes and tutors. Your classmates throw their stuff in as well, not to mention other friends, romantic partners, siblings and parents.

Based on all this helpful advice, you sort of make a decision about what classes to take in college or what job to take. Again, layered over with various shades of self-doubt, role-model and peer influence, is it any doubt that it's a bit of a challenge to get your personally selected dream job first time?

And then into the future, there's a lifetime of experiences with employees, colleagues, your peer group, friends and other acquaintances.

That's where you are now!

You became an amalgam of who you started out as, how your parents influenced you and also what your broader social experience layered on you.

A varying amount of character, preferences and pure uniqueness is still there, just ready to get a career. Your dream job.

When you get to now, right now, when you are feeling fed-up and upset that you aren't doing the dream job you love, you also blame yourself for where you are.

Which is energy that is just not worth expending. Now that you know your dissatisfaction is not your fault. that you've recognized it and want to do something about it.

Park the blame - especially for yourself and realize that you have choices that you can control and progress right now. It's good to know that you have the opportunity.

The next step is to be strong and get past your history. You can choose anything - yes, anything for your dream job. It's up to you.