Sometimes, no matter how much we try and the amount of hours we spend listening to our spouses, it just doesn't seem like enough. Perhaps you've heard the litany of problems to often for it to affect you anymore, perhaps you're depressed and apathetic, making it hard to even care; maybe you were completely unaware that there were problems until the day your spouse burst on you, maybe your partner seems like a constant nag or ball of anger; no matter your situation, these responses and many others are indicators that your marriage is on the rocks and close to the proverbial cliff.



Remember that the more you deal with your little problems, the less big problems you'll have. If your spouse is feeling neglected, be sure you make a conscious effort to spend time with them, even if it's just a once-a-week date night. If your spouse doesn't do something like a simple chore and this annoys you, let them know nicely and don't nag. If they have a problem, don't roll your eyes and tune them out; even if you disagree with their words, they're telling you how they feel. Take it as that, not as a tirade or personal attack.

However, even coping with these problems is often difficult and dealing with them takes more than being a good listener or communicator. So you know how your spouse is feeling; how do you fix it or deal with it?

Sometimes you can't, but most often, you can. If you're a do-it-yourself type, go on the internet and look for sites counseling and helping people with marriage problems. Join a couple forums and learn from your fellows. If you can, include your spouse and try solving your problems together in this fashion. Read about other people's experiences together and this may help put your own in perspective. Even chat room support groups are a good venue for connecting with others who are in a similar situation.

If you're not a self-help type, don't' have the time, or simply want professional help, see a marriage counselor. Even if your marriage seems great, seeing a counselor can help weed out niggling issues before they become big ones. And if your problems are already huge, a marriage counselor can help you get a clearer perspective and figure out how to start resolving your problems.