If you have a young boy or girl who is getting ready for that first big date of their teenage life, you can probably remember how nervous you got that first time. And for many parents, we get as nervous as the kids get about that first stab at taking a girl out on a date for real. So if you can help him out with some ideas on what to do and how to conduct the date, it will make things go a lot smoother for him.



I am sure that your son would love to do the whole date alone, and you should give him the impression he is, but at some point he is going to need to ask for help. Unless he has bags of money for a taxi or wants to 'impress' his date by taking the bus, then he is going to have to come to you for a lift, take the pressure out of it by asking him first if he wants a lift rather than him having to ask you.

You don't want your young guy to go on the first date and either be too pushy or expect too much. Kids need to learn that things take time and the best piece of advice you can give him is that he should just have fun and show his date his true self. Let him know that if he can just make a good impression now then the next dates will be a lot more relaxed and he can work for that first kiss then.

To get past the first date nerves then you could suggest to him that he organises a group date. This means that both he and his date will feel more comfortable and will be able to get to know each other without all the pressure. Having said that though it is important you let them know that they should be staying with their date while out. Not slipping off with their friends to have fun and then wiping out the whole concept of a 'date'.

He may be wary of a group date because he thinks that other children will try to steal his date away from him. First of all reassure him that if she is interested in him and he is paying attention to her during the date then he should not need to worry about that. Then tell him that one trick to get people to stay away is to give her something that she will wear which will show people that she is interested in him. Try a flower for her hair, a bracelet etc, just something simple and inexpensive, she will be pleased to receive a present and if she wears it then everyone will know she is his date.

If he still wants to do it alone then maybe the choice of venue can alleviate some of the pressure. Try bowling which allows both people to focus on something other than each other, and encourages a bit of playful competition. Movies are great for kids to attend, drop them off at the cinema where they can get a bite to eat together and spend some time talking, then they can watch the film together and chat about it after while waiting for you to come and give them a lift home.

Although the traditional idea of a date is a nice meal together, then I don't think your young guy should try that before he gets more experience or if he messes it up he may be reluctant to try again for a while. A bite to eat at the cinema is fine, or going to the food court and buying her dinner is sufficient for him to feel like a gentleman, then after a while he should have the experience to try his hand at a restaurant date.

The young man should be also be taught that at the end of the first date he should be a perfect gentleman and walk her all the way home. He should understand that he does not need to get a kiss to have a good date, that all women are different and he will offend her if he tries to force a kiss. Tell him to watch for signs that she wants to kiss him on the cheek or give him a hug etc, no doubt her parents will be watching from inside so tell him he doesn't want to upset them on the first date!

If the young couple feels like they got to go out together, that it was an event where they were definitely "a couple" and if each got to do some datelike thing on that outing, that is plenty of romance for the first time out.