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Very Funny One Liners

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Because one of the most attractive personality traits a man can have is the ability to use humor. Today, I'm going to give you some funny one liners to use when interacting with women.



At some point in an initial interaction, a woman will usually ask the classis question, "So what do you do?" This provides you with a great opportunity to use some funny one liners and demonstrate the attractive personality trait of humor.

You have a few options. First you might like to joke around and say, "I'm an actor, I just got a leading role on [insert the latest hit show on TV]" and have her say, "Really?" to your reply of a slight chuckle and possibly a playful jab or tickle to make her laugh more.

She might then reply with something like "No, c'mon -what do you really do?" and you can say something like:

- Nothing. Yes, that's right. I'm actually looking for a rich girl who will support me...because I want to be one of those stay-at-home husbands, y'know? Look after the TV, watch Oprah and all that sort of stuff. Is that okay with you?

Or, you might want to have her guess: "Guess" (for 1 or 2 times and then tell her the real answer). Or, make it out like she isn't cool enough for you: "Ohh...well, I don't know if you could handle the answer. After all, you look a little innocent."

The following funny one liner will help steer the conversation towards sex.

You: Hmmm...I don't usually tell people like you. You look like you might get offended

Her: Why? What is it?

You: Well...it involves the lower part of my body.

Her (Here a lot of women will try to be funny and play along): What, like a podiatrist?

You: Nope, guess again.

Her: A foot masseuse?

You: Nope - go a little higher (point to your crotch and give a little cheeky grin).

Her: Haha! A gigalo!

You (Looking seriously offended and taken back): No actually I model men's underwear. I can't believe you think I'm a man-whore! I'm going to charge you double!

Her: Haha!

You might also want to reverse the question about your occupation, make it out like she is trying to pick you up and comment that you're not going to fall for her sleazy pick-up tricks.

Beautiful women are not expecting these sorts of funny one liners from men and as such, the emotion they get from your unpredictable behavior sparks a strong attraction.

- Whoa, are you trying to find out if I'm rich? I mean, we've only just met and you're already behaving like a gold-digger...geez, you're pretty full on.

- Look...I don't want to marry you yet, ok? We've just met. I work as a masseuse. Is that ok? Good. Now when do you want your first appointment? I accept Visa, Mastercard and Diners, but not American Express because they charge me an extra 2% per transaction!

You: What do I do? Hmmm, very forward of you...are you trying to pick me up???

Her: What? No! Haha!

You: Yes you are!(Playfully tickle or poke her, or just shake your head as if you are ashamed for her). Alright, so I'll tell you what I do...but no marriage proposals, ok?

Her: Ok.

You: I'm a masseuse, a salsa dance teacher and a rock n roll star.

Her: (Most likely laughing).

The same funny one liner rules apply when a woman asks for your name:

- Brad...Brat Pitt.

- James...James Bond.

- Peter Russelloffanonanonanon.

- Dracula.

If she laughs at your response, emotion is present. If she becomes playfully frustrated at your response, emotion is present. And if you don't already know - the most important thing is how you make a woman feel.

If you can use humor to make women feel great emotions, it won't matter if you're 3 feet tall, with no teeth - she will feel attraction for you. However, if you were to answer her questions logically, no strong emotion would be present and you'd simply be two strangers getting to know each other in a non-sexual way.

Disclaimer: A woman will get annoyed if she can never get a straight answer from you. Once you notice that she is actually interested in talking to you, ease up on the funny one liners a little and change gears to develop a connection with her.
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