Some people tend to have a "magnetic" personality that easily attracts others to them, while some people have no magnetism and tend to be ignored by others. What makes the difference among people who have personal magnetism and those who do not? Is it some mysterious something called "charisma?" Is it "allure," "charm," or "that certain something?" I believe that the way people react to you is, to a large extent, within your control. Hence I've listed 9 interactive skills you can easily apply that will almost certainly increase your attractiveness to others.
1. Remember That the Other Person Has an Ego
One of the principal keys to increasing your interpersonal attractiveness is to concentrate your attention on the needs of the other individual's ego, not your own.
2. Refrain from Making Obvious Criticisms
If you nitpick and find every little thing wrong with everything, you will be seen as petty and trivial in your approach to life. Big people let the little things go - without comment.
3. Make the Other Person Feel Important
If someone makes you feel that you are indeed a very important person in his or her eyes, you are likely to be attracted to that person.
4. Pay Compliments Often
Don't confuse giving a compliment with flattery. A compliment is sincere and genuine while flattery most often is the opposite.
5. Avoid Talking About Yourself
Focus your attention and interest on the other person, not yourself. Allow others to talk about themselves and their interests first. Subsequently, you can talk a little about yourself and your interests. But do it sparingly.
6. Smile Frequently
Rate the power of a smile highly when you are trying to win a friend. A genuine smile communicates silently a world of meaning.
7. Make Good Eye Contact When You Are Conversing
Eye contact is one of the primary ways in which you communicate to others that you are interested in them and what they have to say.
8. Acquire the Art of Active Listening
When you are listening to someone else talk, make a conscious effort to match, within reasonable limits, the other individual's facial expression.
9. Be Rewarding to Others, But Not Excessively So
People tend to favour befriending someone who can benefit them in some way. But ff you are excessively rewarding to another person with little or no cost to that individual, you are likely to eventually be taken for granted.
If you are lonely and can't seem to form friendships, don't be discouraged. There are a lot you can do to improve the state of your personal life. You don't have to accept conditions as they are. Much is within your own control. Put the 9 strategies above into practice, and you'll see yourself winning friends in no time.
