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Porche Reingold
There is nothing quite like it. You are out on a date, and suddenly both parties run out of things to say. The remainder of the date is a seemingly endless gauntlet of foiled conversation attempts and stretched out silences, and at the end of the night both of you know that you will probably never attempt a make up with that person.
Awkward silences can be a killer when it comes to dating; not only have you lost a prospective relationship, you have also wasted an evening. The great shame of it is, most dates have no reason at all for these awkward silences. There should always be something to talk about, and even the chronically shy can find some topic to keep the night proceeding smoothly.
The thing about a date is that it is no different than any other part of life. No matter what you are doing, there will be something to talk about. If you find yourself running out of conversation, then try to for an easy topic by focusing on the date itself- you might talk about the food or the scenery in a restaurant, your feelings on the movie you just saw. Once the conversation gets rolling, it will probably begin to stretch out into other areas and soon enough you will find that the evening is flying by. A great way to measure the quality of the conversation is by the amount of laughter between you. Laughter indicates a high level of comfort and enjoyment, so if you are both laughing chances are that the date is going well.
There are several things worse than awkward silences, if truth be told. A person trying too hard to overcome the silence may wind up making a serious ass out of herself. Know the difference between an awkward silence and a comfortable or reflective one. A reflective silence, following a particularly good point or part of the conversation, can be an even better indicator of the positive outcomes of the date than even laughter is.
Never break a silence by starting to talk about how wonderful you are. Feel free to begin by talking about yourself, but be sure to include your date in the topic- ask what he does for a living, if he enjoys it, what the future plans and goals are. This advice should be tripled for men- in fact, it is mostly guys that need to watch the silences on a date. If a girl is talking, then she is probably having a good time and the date will go down as a positive experience.
The key to avoiding an awkward date is to focus on your current conversations instead of thinking about the next topics. Avoid backtracking and keep the conversation moving forward. Above all, make sure that if you haven't heard your date say a word in a while, that you leave an opening in the conversation for her to respond. Good communication is the key to any relationship, short term or long, and it begins with good conversation.
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