Getting back together with your ex after a breakup can seem to be thoroughly hopeless. You aren't the only person who has felt this way but you need to know that getting her back is very doable. It is very commonplace for couples to get together again after a difficult breakup. So calm down, lose the pessimism, and take some action.

1.) Men are supposed to be self assured and strong in our culture. They're the doers, they're expected to go out into the world and make it their own. Women intuitively expect this. The issue of sensitivity in men has been the subject of much discussion.

Women will find sensitivity appealing if it is combined with self-assurance and strength. Any behavior that is clingy or needy will be seen as a weakness. These expressions of desperation and panic shouldn't be confused with sensitivity. She will see you more as a child than as a man.

2.) Try to resist the urge to patch things up as fast as possible after a breakup. It doesn't have to be fixed up over night. In fact, it is best to allow a cooling off period of about a month.

It's best if the breakup wasn't overly hostile or threatening. Time is required to reflect and to get things into perspective. Getting back together doesn't make sense if you don't understand the reasons for the breakup.

3.) Don't ask your ex to admit to any fault. Bear in mind that you approached her about getting back together, not the other way around. Demands will only re-ignite old arguments. Sometimes she will admit to some fault, but that is entirely her prerogative. All that matters is that you admit your share of the blame and leave it at that.

4.) Start a self improvement program. The improvement should be internal as well as external. Take off those extra pounds, put some effort into coordinating your wardrobe, and do whatever else that needs improvement. This is also the time to recognize and correct personal faults that contributed to the breakup.

Your actions after the separation will determine whether or not you can get her back into your life. Everything will depend on the correct actions and the correct timing of those actions. Stay calm, create a plan, and act on it.