It's Saturday night in a crowded bar. A man and woman are locked in conversation. She's laughing, batting her eyelashes and playing with her hair. He's standing with his head tilted slightly, leaning in toward her and occasionally touching her arm. They're performing a social ritual that's been around for more than 5,000 years — flirting.

Flirting is one of the great joys in life. It's an ego booster that makes you feel more attractive and desirable. Flirt with someone and they feel excited, flattered, appreciated and darn good about themselves. So indulge yourself whenever possible.

Two things are going on when you flirt. The first is the actual conversation, and the second is your body language. Flirting is an enticement and an invitation that lets the other person catch glimpses of your most attractive characteristics and behaviors.

These days, it's a lost art, but it's great fun when done well. Practice flirting with acquaintances or friends of the opposite sex (without telling them) and see what techniques get the best response.

For those who feel clueless about where to even start, we assure you that flirting is a learned behavior. It's not only possible to pick up the basics, but with a little practice, you can perfect the art. Let's start with the flirting conversation.

Can We Talk?

Flirting is considered a meta-conversation, which means it's three or four degrees of separation from what you're really saying. There's an underlying meaning to everything that's said. You might say directly, “That's really interesting,” but the underlying meaning is, “I'm interested in you — perhaps sexually.” There's a lot of unspoken communication going on: suggesting without stating, eye contact, body language, nods, smiles, encouragement and perhaps the start of something big.

Some men believe flirting is teasing encouragement and expect something at the end of it. If this is you, let us set you straight: If a woman flirts with you, or you flirt with her, it's simply an opportunity for an entertaining exchange of playful banter. It doesn't mean you are guaranteed anything — not a dance, a drink, or a date.

Flirting is all about showing interest in the other person. So ask questions and be attentive to the answers. Sometimes you can get caught up in the seductive aspect of flirting and find yourself stuck without a word to say. If this happens, there is a very powerful technique you can use called active listening. It's easy and will help you think of topics to discuss in any situation.

The most interesting people are usually the ones who are most interested in others. Suppose your date (or potential date) tells you about her day and she mentions that she bought plants for her garden. You can use that to move into a fun conversation. Her garden might not mean anything to you, but it's obviously important to her. So you could say, “What's it like?” She'll jump at the chance to answer and actually think you're more interesting because you are interested in HER garden. And she'll become more interested in you! She interested and intrigued by your desire to get to know her more.