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Very Very Hot Woman
Dan Mcdonley
Sweat starts beading up on your forehead. You start unconsciously clenching your fists in fear. Your feet are glued to the floor. Only moments ago you were the most entertaining fun guy in the group. Then it all changed as their really gorgeous friend comes over and starts talking to you. You start tripping over your words and you end up excusing yourself just to save face. ?What the hell!? you think.
It is like this for so many guys I have talked to. They are quite charming with mildly attractive women but the moment they talk to a very beautiful woman they clam up and are unable to do it.
I hate to lay down this fact but as long as beautiful women intimidate you to the point you can't be yourself, you won't be successful in dating them. Why? It is about agenda. Ever notice women you are not interested often fall for you? It is because you are confidently yourself around them and have no agenda when you are with them. With a very beautiful woman she evokes in us this base desire to obtain her, to HAVE her. This creates a very predator prey relationship and what does prey do when around a predator? She runs, and runs fast.
There is a book I recently read called ?The Female Brain? that explains that the part of a woman's brain that sees and interprets non-verbal signals relating to social interaction such as body language, tonality, and intent, is ten times larger than the corresponding part of a man's brain. Women can sense when you are not being genuine or when you start having an agenda to HAVE her.
Some experts actually go so far to say that a relationship where you are extremely attracted to her won't ever work. I personally feel that is going too far. However they have a point. The more attracted you are the more agenda you will have and the less yourself you will be. So what is the antidote for HWS (Hot Woman Syndrome)?
The antidote is stop putting her up on a pedestal!!! If you knew she ripped the heads off of small animals in her spare time would you still be attracted to her? If that doesn't turn you off then insert any morally repugnant thing she could do and assume she just might. The fact is you don't know her. Even after dating her for a while you can't fool yourself that you know every skeleton in her closet! Understand you are attracted to her for her looks, but is that really enough for you? I know I want both an attractive woman and someone who has a personality I am attracted to. I don't know if I am attracted to her personality for quite some time. The problem is most guys find out the minimum about her and any faults are not immediately obvious. They then just assume her personality is up to their standards. Don't assume.
I go into interactions with beautiful women with genuine interest in who they are, without the assumption that I want to have any kind of romantic or sexual relationship with them. I need to get to know them to find out if they are up to my standards. I treat them the same way I treat a woman I am not attracted to in an interaction. I am every bit myself and I don't have an agenda with her. If I find out more about her that I like then I escalate as I do in interactions I have with less attractive women. No time do I put her on a pedestal above me. We are equal, period.
So do whatever you need to do to get rid of your agenda and stay true to being yourself when you are around an extremely beautiful woman. Personally I just assume she might have dismembered puppy heads in her purse. Yes I know I am a bit weird. It works for me though. I just don't tell her that.
Not everywoman lives up to my standards, just because she is really hot doesn't? pre-approve her for anything in my mind. It shouldn't in your mind either. Take the time to find out what is interesting about her and appreciate it just like anyone else. Stay confidently and actively being yourself.
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