The traditional definition of cheating, or infidelity, is

that one person in a committed relationship is physically

involved with someone other than their spouse. Due to a

number of factors, cheating behavior has been reclassified

to include the traditional definition and a more

contemporary definition, known as emotional infidelity.

The Definition of Emotional Infidelity

Emotional infidelity is defined as any infidelity that

occurs through feeling or thought. During the late 1970s,

in an interview with Playboy magazine, former President

Jimmy Carter stated that occasionally he "lusted in (his)

heart" for women other than his wife. His thoughts were

equated with infidelity, and he was considered to be

unfaithful to his marriage, even though his statement

described emotional infidelity, not physical infidelity.

Since that time, and with the technological development of

cell phones and the internet, the definition of cheating has

been expanded to include the traditional definition, plus

the feelings and/or thoughts that comprise emotional

infidelity. Cheating now includes having intimate

correspondence with someone while on a cell phone, meeting someone over the Internet and maintaining a relationship, or viewing pornographic material through any available source.

The Difference Between Traditional Cheating and Emotional Infidelity

The primary difference between traditional cheating and

emotional infidelity is actual, physical contact.

Traditionally, cheating involves people meeting face to

face, and then engaging in physical intimacy. With

emotional infidelity, there may be a meeting, but it can

occur on a cell phone or a computer. There may be physical activity involved, but it is conducted within the confines of separate locations; the people involved aren't "actually" touching. Many of the people who are emotionally cheating don't consider it to be infidelity. Their rationale is that, because there is no actual physical contact, the behavior can't be considered cheating.

For some people, there is no difference between traditional

and emotional infidelity. They view emotional infidelity as

having the same behavioral components and end result as

traditional cheating; therefore, any perceived differences

are a moot point. When someone cheats, they use flirtation, discussion, seduction, and discretion - regardless of where either person is located or what vehicle of communication they are using. The end result is that the unfaithful spouse is paying emotional and/or physical attention to someone other than their partner, and they are removing themselves from the marriage commitment.

Emotional Intimacy Can Lead To Physical Intimacy

Emotional infidelity begins with the exchange of personal

information. As the people involved get acquainted, the

information exchanged becomes more personal. When the information becomes personal, it can lead to a face-to-face meeting and, most likely, physical intimacy. It can be

argued that emotional infidelity is harmless because it is

more of a casual relationship than traditional cheating;

however, the intimate nature of the communication, plus the emotional investment made by the people involved, places emotional infidelity on the same level as traditional

cheating.

Considering the wide-reaching capabilities of the internet,

the continuing advancement of cell phone technology, and the various other communication devices available, the number of people engaged in emotional infidelity will only increase. People cannot be stopped from engaging in an illicit affair, but they should consider the effect that cheating will have on the spouse. They should also consider the possible consequences of emotional infidelity, which can be the same as those of traditional infidelity, including divorce.