I'm tired of self-respect   I can't afford a car   I wanna be a prefab superstar   I wanna be a tool   Don't need no soul   Wanna make big money   Playing rock and roll   I'll make my music boring   I'll play my music slow   I ain't no artist   I'm a businessman   No ideas of my own      I won't offend   Or rock the boat   Just sex and drugs   And rock and roll      Drool, drool, drool, drool, drool (etc.) My payola!   Drool, drool, drool, drool, drool (etc.) My payola!      You'll pay ten bucks to see me   On a fifteen foot high stage   Fatass bouncers kick the shit   Out of kids who try to dance   If my friends say I''ve lost my guts"   I'll laugh and say   That's rock and roll   But there's just one problem...      Is my cock big enough   Is my brain small enough   For you to make me a star   Give me a toot, I'll sell you my soul   Pull my strings and I'll go far      And when I'm rich   And meet Bob Hope   We'll shoot some golf   And shoot some dope      Is my cock big enough   Is my brain small enough   For you to make me a star   Give me a toot, I'll sell you my soul   Pull my strings and I'll go far