We started in the morning, carried well into the night   Throwing dirty dishes with all our might   Sad commentary on a marriage that has failed   I?m at home getting hammered while she?s out getting nailed      Police pulled into my trailer park   Domestic violence cost [Incomprehensible] after dark   Late night with her boss, says they?re trying to make a sale   I?m at home getting hammered while she?s out getting nailed      I'm at home drinking whiskey in my easy chair   Watching Jerry Lawler pulling Andy Kauffman?s hair   Had a suspicion, so I opened up her mail   I?m at home getting hammered while she?s out getting nailed      She used to bring me beer and love all over me   Right before I went on disability   My wiggler ain't so straight, I got whiskey dick   She don?t perk it up 'cause, 'cause her ankles got so thick      Well, the moral of this story is sad but true   I love to drink and she loves to screw   Hobo?s got a better life, riding on the rails   I?m at home getting hammered while she?s out getting nailed