Ahh yeah   I looked out the window and seen his bald head   Ran to the fridge and pulled out an egg   Scoped him with my scopes he had no hair   Launched that shot and he was caught out there   Saw the convertible driving by   Loaded up the slingshot and let one fly   He went for his to find he didn't have one   Put him in check correct with my egg gun   The egg a symbol of life   Go inside your house and bust out your wife   I pulled out the jammy he thought it was a joke   The trigger I pulled his face the yoke   Reached in his pocket took all his cash   Left my man standing with an egg moustache   Suckers they come a dime a dozen   When I say dozen you know what I'm talking about boy      Yea that's right I'm the Egg Man Driving around   King of the town "Yea"   Always got my windows rolled down   Ready to throw   You know I'm the Egg Man      Once upon a time   You know I'm the Egg Man      Humpty Dumpty was a big fat egg   He was playing the wall then he broke his leg   Tossed it out the window three minutes hot   Hit the Rastaman he said "bloodclot"   Which came first the chicken or the egg   I egged the chicken and then I ate his leg   Riding the trains in between cars   When I pull out the station "you're gonna get yours"   Drive by eggings plaguing L.A   "Yo they just got my little cousin ese"   Sometimes hard boiled sometimes runny Ray   Comes from a chicken not a bunny dummy   People laugh, it's no joke   My name's Yauch and I'm throwing the yoke   "Now they got me in a cell" but I don't care   It was then that I caught catching people out there      Up on the roof In my car up all night   I'm going through science like Dolemite   The Mack Who   I'm the Egg Man, taxi driver   I'm the Egg Man   "Egg Man, Egg Man "      We all dressed in black we snuck up around the back   We began to attack the eggs did crack on Haze's back   Sam I am down with the program   Green eggs and ham Yosemite Sam   Come Halloween you know I come strapped   I throw it at a sucker K-pap   You made the mistake and judge a man by his race   You go through life with egg on your face   Woke up in the morning peculiar feeling   Looked up and saw egg dripping from the ceiling   Families punk rocks the businessman   I'll dog anybody with an egg in my hand   Not like the crack that you put in a pipe   But crack on your forehead here's a towel now wipe      "Egg Man Egg Man Egg Man Egg Man Egg Man Egg Man   Egg Man Egg Man Egg Man Egg Man Egg Man Egg Man   Egg Man Egg Man Egg Man Egg Man Egg Man "   Egg Man