Theres the cool kids   Theres the preps and theres the skate punks and the jocks   And then theres me   Theres the losers   Theres the nerds and theres the stoners and the Goths   And then theres me      But then theres you   Cause you're the new kid in the school   Not defined by one specific breed   And so your free to flip from group to group   From scene to scene   Cause you're the consulate, the medium, the go-between   Which means your perfectly positioned to get me what I need      Evan:   Look, Archie, Im the wrong guy for this.      Archie:   One date, thats all Im asking.      Evan:   Isn't there some nice girl on the special needs bus?      Archie:   They don't like me   Even back before the crutches, it was clear I don't fit here   So its hopeless   I cant walk right up to Kendra and say Hey,   Shed run away      But look at you   You're making friends and having parties   And adapting at impressive speed   Just twenty minutes as were sitting so our knees can touch   Yes, its a tiny inconvenience, but it means so much   Cause out of all of Indiana, you can get me what I need      Evan:   Its impossible!      Archie:   And what I need is Kendra!      Others:   Kendra, Kendra!      Archie:   Beautiful Kendra!      Others:   Kendra, Kendra!      Archie:   Wonderful Kendra!   Make her appear!      Boys:   If you want a girl, the girl you want is      Archie:   Kendra!   Very hot, Kendra!      Boys:   Very hot, very hot      Archie:   Go tell Kendra   Im waiting here      Heres the problem   Every minute, every second that I wait might be too late   So lets face it,   If I ever had a chance, the time is now, I don't care how   Just do your best   And I wont bother you again and thats a promise guaranteed      So, you can help me out and it can go through very well   Or I can turn around and make your life a living hell   Its up to you, you've got a choice, you've got incentive to succeed   Yes, I know it sounds insane   Jerry Lewis can explain   You've got to help me, Evan   Help me, Evan   Help me, Evan   Help me, Evan   Get me what I need      Evan:   Ill try!      Archie:   I knew you would.