[ VERSE 1 ]    I was at the bar with my drinking team    And it was me, Jack Daniels and my homie Jim Beam    We were kinda blizzed and we were tryin to behave, yo    When in walked a soldier, he was from the Fuzzy Navel    We were fallin, stumblin, crawlin    In came the police, Captain Tom Collins    And the vato said, "Freeze!" (Freeze!)    He said, "Hands in the air and hand over your keys"    Now we did, and that was kinda simple    Now here came Margarita and her friend Shirley Temple    I asked my friend 'bout Margarita    He said that Shirley was a virgin and I wouldn't wanna meet her    So I talked to Margarita, cause, yo, she was flyer    I took her to the couch, cause I wanted to srew-drive her    Now I'm not one for a speech    But there was plenty of Tequila and Sex on the Beach    Y'all    Tequila       [ *horn section plays the 'Tequila' theme* ]       T-T-T-Tequila       Yeah       Alright       Come on       [ crowd ]    TEQUILA!       [ VERSE 2 ]    Here we go again and I'm not fussin    See, I'm a French Mexican but I kick it with White Russians    At the bar with the drink in my hand    In walked José Cuevo, it was Margarita's man    I talked to the Wise Man, cause yo, he's distinguished    His name is St. Ides and he spoke in Olde English    He said, "You better think fast    Cause José is kinda crazy and I heard he shot blast"    He gave me some advice and it went like this, yo    "Catch the Nighttrain and head up to 'Cisco"    I didn't wanna stick around    I caught the 1(:)51 to New York, the Greyhound    Now I'm at the Red Zone, everybody stylin    Showbiz was sippin Ice Teas on Long Island    I blacked out, the party came to a halt    Cause I was drinkin the Tequila with the lemon and salt    Y'all    Tequila       [ *horn section plays the 'Tequila' theme* ]       T-T-T-Tequila       Yeah       Alright       [ crowd ]    TEQUILA!       [ VERSE 3 ]    I woke up in the morning and felt like a zombie    The Tequila Gold Label had bombed me    You see, I woke up late, I wasn't feelin so great    And Mike said, "There's a Bacardi party startin at 8"    Yo, we walked in the party and started playin our games    We played tops, spuds and quarters with Bartles & Jaymes    Here came Shirley Temple and they told me to chill    Because the Mickey Brothers took her up to Strawberry Hill    They took her $1000 mink and she could barely think    Cause the Tequila that she drank had her tickled pink    Now the music came on and I rocked the instrumental    There's a groupie named Mai Tai, a fly oriental    A groupie is a girl that jocks    She wore a def Black Velvet and drank Scotch on the rocks    We had a Fake Marriage, now here's the Honeymoon    Yo, it's on, Vagabond at the Blue Lagoon    Now everybody take a couple of words from the wise    A girlie and a bottle - Tequila Sunrise    Tequila       [ *horn section plays the 'Tequila' theme* ]       Yeah       Alright       Come on       [ crowd ]    TEQUILA!