I made a machine    Called The Boy Least Likely To.   It feeds me shortbread biscuits,    And it makes my little dreams come true.      It thinks for me,   And everything I used to do it does for me,   It’s made of aluminum,    And it runs off pencil batteries.      I know that it makes me happy,   But something about it frightens me.      I made a machine    To make my life easier,    But it’s made it more complicated   Than it ever was before.      I programmed it    To simulate the feelings that I used to get.   It reads me bedtime stories,   And it makes me feel human again.      It doesn’t have to understand   What it’s doing,   And it does everything    A human being can.      It stores my thoughts and feelings   In its database.      I tell it things,    When I’m feeling sad.   Sometimes it the only    Real friend that I have,   And that’s what makes me sad.      I made a machine    Called The Boy Least Likely To.   It has lots of switches and buttons,   But I don’t know what they do.      I know it can’t    Understand the intricacies of my heart,   But when I cuddle up to it   It comes to life in my arms.      I know that it makes me happy,    But something about it frightens me.