Push me out from the darkness    To a sky that's colored blue    Somewhere someone's finding happiness    While I'm still here so hung up on you       Nothing is real    And I want you to know    That I'm not alright    When you tear open my chest    I'll try not to flinch    Won't make promises    I won't make promises    You taught me that.    I'm still losing what's left of my self esteem    And I'm still watching the slow fading of all my daydreams       The hardest things to say are the words that mean the most    So I'll bite my tongue till it bleeds and I doubt you'll even know    The easiest things to fake are feelings to fool someone else    And I've been tricked for so long by you that I spent these last few months in my own hell       A failed apology    A day too late but now I see    That all you really want's to see me dangle neck first from a tree    But what would you need me for    You've got friends galore    And all you'll ever be to me is a stupid lying excuse for a person      I could call    But I know that you won't be there to pick up the phone    You don't have time for me    I could call but I know you won't get the phone    Don't have time for me       I hate myself    For loving you like this    I hate myself for hating myself    Just enough to love you    Just enough to love you