Five guys take a ride, drive a day and half a night   Get to see some pretty scenery   But if that's all there is to this   This band would split right down the seams      Southbound, static on the radio   We left town but where we're goin' I don't know   Somewhere we're gonna play another show   Quick get off and gas up at the Conoco      We're driving   We drive against the grain   Like postmen in the rain      Welcome to our big rock show   Wind us up and watch this puppy go   Hope you heard a single word we said   One little rock to rattle in your head      Hey kid, pit mosh, please avoid the flashpot   Yeah, it's really funny 'til an eyebrow gets singed off   Your mother's got nothing here to fear or dread   Our abrasive is gentle on baby's skin head      Soundchecks, don't forget the spandex   This mix is sounding like a bad train wreck   It takes some spit and grit and sweat   To give you more than you expect      We're driven   To give you what we know   Like postmen through the snow      Welcome to our big rock show   Wind us up and watch this puppy go   Hope you heard a single word we said   One little rock to rattle in your head      Got a cryptic coder   On the microphone   Find the secret message   Buried in our big rock show