Give us this day our daily dose of faux affliction   Forgive our sins   Forged at the pulpit with forked tongues   Selling faux sermons      'Cause I am a new wave gospel sharp   And you'll be thy witness   So gentlemen, if you are gonna preach   For God sakes preach with conviction      Strike up the band   Whoa, the conductor is beckoning   Come congregation, let's sing it like you mean it   No, don't you get it, don't you get it? Now, don't you move      Strike up the band   Whoa, the conductor is beckoning   Come congregation, let's sing it like you mean it   No, don't you get it, don't you get it? Now, don't you move      Just stay where I can see you   Douse the lights   We sure are in for a show tonight      In this little number we are graced   By two displays of character   We've got the gunslinger extraordinaire   Walking contradictions      And I for one can see no blood   From the hearts and the wrists you allegedly slit   And I for one won't stand for this   If the scene were a parish you'd all be condemned      Strike up the band   Whoa, the conductor is beckoning   Come congregation, let's sing it like you mean it   No, don't you get it, don't you get it? Now, don't you move      Strike up the band   Whoa, the conductor is beckoning   Come congregation, let's sing it like you mean it   No, don't you get it, don't you get it? Now, don't you, don't you move      Just stay where I can see you   Douse the lights   We sure are in for a show tonight      Just stay where I can see you   Douse the lights   We sure are in for a show tonight      Stay where I can see you   Douse the lights      Strike up the band   Whoa, the conductor is beckoning   Come congregation, let's sing it like you mean it   No, don't you get it, don't you get it? Now, don't you move      Strike up the band   Whoa, the conductor is beckoning   Come congregation, let's sing it like you mean it   No, don't you get it, don't you get it? Now, don't you move      Don't you move   Don't you move   Strike up the band