Follow the way of the cheesy crumpet,    Thin on top, full of goodness,    The crumpet is my leader, bakes itself for me,    Sacrificing itself to stop me from starving.       Praise the cheesy crumpet,    thou hast triumphed over evil    Praise the cheesy crumpet,    thou hast triumphed over evil       There was a man called Dave,    He ate 3 a day,    His hair went green,    In spite of his belief       Praise the cheesy crumpet,    thou hast triumphed over evil    Praise the cheesy crumpet,    thou hast triumphed over evil       Personally I don't like crumpets,    I just don't like cheese,    It's disgusting.