My Girl's got a really big forehead  My girl's only got four toes  She knows I'm as good as she'll get  She always knows  My girl's got a shiny tuxedo  She frowns every time I smile  She knows that she'll always be there though  She always knows  (chorus)  She's got a motor car  She knows it can go fast  It drives remote control  She's too slow  My friends say she's got a great hairpiece  He says she's a waste of time  She says that her name is Clarice  I don't mind  (chorus)  My girl says that I should get out more  I spend too much time alone  I've marred her precious ego  Half of which is silicone  (chorus)  My life's got a bad sense of humour  My girl's got a mouth full of teeth  She smiles every time I go near her  My name is Keith  My name is Keith  My name is Keith  My name is Keith