The Carter family lived next door   For almost 14 years   With Gwen and I inseperatable   From rag dolls through brassieres      Then Gwen began to bore me   With her giggles and her fears   The day the Carters moved away   I had to fake my tears      I told new friends Gwen Carter    Had become a silly pest   And then I found I missed her   More than I'd ever have guessed      Grandma used to nag at me   To straighten up my spine   To act respectful and read good books   To take care of what was mine      I hated being criticized   And asking her permission   So what if her advise was wise   It always hurt to listen      I didn't cry when Granny died   She made me so depressed   And then I found I missed her   More than I'd ever have guessed      You used to make me moan in bed   But that can't be enough   My friends complained your jokes were crude   Your manners were too rough      Don't know just what I wanted   But I know I wanted more   Someone smooth, presentable   To blend with my decor      And now at night I think of how    You grinned when you undressed   And I find I miss you    More than I'd ever have guessed