Somebody told me you’d found new bonhomie   Going places you’d never go with me   I felt myself become a bitter old shrew   Oh, I’d have bitten you in two if you would let me      I’d look deadly as a nun   Martyrdom does not become me   I’ll find love in vanity   Somebody told me you’d found places to go   New people to know, new ladies and so   I felt myself become a bitter old shrew   I’d have bitten her in two if you would let me      So if I don’t laugh what do I do?   If I don’t laugh and see this through   I shouldn’t even think of you   Allow me one extravagance   Before they come and ban me   And let me shoot the messenger      So help me God they talk so much   This knowledge ain’t my business   But I hang on his every word   God speed his journey back to Hell   I might retreat singing   But all I hear is you   Just give me one more shot of gin   I’ll scream along to anything   Just let me shoot the messenger