plopped down in my easy chair and I turned on Channel 2   A bad gunslinger called Salty Sam was chasin' poor Sweet Sue   He trapped her in the old sawmill and said with an evil eye   He said if you don't give me the deed to your ranch   I'll saw you all in half   And then he grabbed her and then   He tied her up and then   He turned on the buzzsaw and then and then   And then along came Jones   Tall thin Jones   Slow walkin' Jones   Slow talkin' Jones   Along came long lean lanky Jones      Commercial came on so I got up to get myself a snack   You should've seen what was goin' on by the time that I got back   Down in the old abandoned mine Sweet Sue was havin' fits   That villain said give me the deed to your ranch   Or I'll blow you all to bits   And then he grabbed her and then   He tied her up and then   He lit the fuse to the dynamite and then and then      And then along came Jones   Tall thin Jones   Slow walkin' Jones   Slow talkin' Jones   Along came long lean lanky Jones      I got so bugged I turned it off and turned on another show   But there was the same old shoot 'em up and the same old rodeo   Salty Sam was tryin' to stuff Sweet Sue in a burlap sack   He said if you don't give me the deed to your ranch   I'm gonna throw you on the railroad tracks   And then he grabbed her and then   He tied her up and then   He threw her on the railroad tracks and then   A train started comin' and then and then      And then along came Jones   Tall thin Jones   Slow walkin' Jones   Slow talkin' Jones   Along came long lean lanky Jones   Along came long lean lanky JOnes