Why are all our heroes so imperfect   Why do they always bring me down   Why are all our heroes so imperfect   The statue in the park has lost his crown      William Faulkner drunk and depressed   Dorothy Parker mean, drunk and depressed   And that guy in Seven Years in Tibet turned out to be a Nazi   The founding fathers all had slaves   The explorers slaughtered the braves   The old testament God can be so petty      Paul McCartney jealous of John, even more so now that he's gone   Dylan was so mean to Donovan in that movie   Pablo Picasso cruel to his wives   My favorite poets took their own lives   Orson Welles peaked at 25, ballooned before our eyes   And he sold bad wine      Heard Babe Ruth was full of malice   Lewis Carroll I'm sure did Alice   Plato in the cave with those very young boys   TS Elliott hated Jews, FDR didn't save the Jews      All the French joined the resistance after the war   Raymond Chandler drunk and depressed   Tennessee Williams drunk and depressed   Think I'll just get drunk and depressed