It’s so hard to have a conversation with you   It’s not what you say or what you do   You’re my real good friend   Yes, that I must admit   That’s why it breaks my heart to tell you this      You spit when you talk   Oh yeah, I had to say it   Got something to say   And then you go and spray it   I got a dry-cleaning bill and   I’m gonna make you pay it   You spit when you talk   Oh yeah yeah, you spit when you talk      Well, at the office party   You sang karaoke   Electrocuted yourself   Singing “Okie from Muskogee”   It’s not a little secret   No, it’s something that is known   If you want to talk about it can’t you call me on the phone?      Because you spit when you talk   And I’m just being honest   Everything I own   Has your saliva on it   If I talk to you much longer   I swear I’m gonna vomit   You spit when you talk   Oh yeah yeah, you spit when you talk      Now the only friends you have   Are on Facebook and on MySpace   They all talk behind your back   ‘Cause it’s the only dry place   You were so excited at the game   When Jeter had a triple   Got my T-shirt so wet that everybody saw my nipples      You spit when you talk   And it ain’t getting better   I know what you had for dinner   ‘Cause it’s right here on my sweater   If you’ve got an interpreter   You’d better go and get her   You spit when you talk   Oh yeah yeah, you spit when you talk      Oh yeah yeah, you spit when you talk