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Sam invents the you you wanna see
Don't believe in predestiny
Bacon you never need to bring home
Sam Hell gets you redeemed by grace alone

Sam's the Mayor of First Avenue
Nothing goes on he doesn't want to
A wife that wears his 'in' stocking hat
She's known for making good, gravy and cat, a cat

Heart attack time to eat and pay
The cellulite won't wash away
You never knew if you'd been dead or just old
Sam Hell never gets that cold
Sam invents the you you wanna see   Don't believe in predestiny   Bacon you never need to bring home   Sam Hell gets you redeemed by grace alone      Sam's the Mayor of First Avenue   Nothing goes on he doesn't want to   A wife that wears his 'in' stocking hat   She's known for making good, gravy and cat, a cat      Heart attack time to eat and pay   The cellulite won't wash away   You never knew if you'd been dead or just old   Sam Hell never gets that cold