As he came up to the window, heard the sound of, Barry Manilow   He came into her apartment, smelled the Ben Gay, and the chocolate   She was sitting at the table, he could see she, had a Bible   Then she ran into the bedroom, got her teeth down, and her perfume      Granny, are you OK, you OK, you OK, Granny? (4X)      Granny's not an old maid, She's a zealot, with a bold faith   She's a kind-hearted widow, and she bought you, a Nintendo, last week   You came into her apartment, left the mud stains, on the carpet   And then she ran into the bedroom, she was knelt down, it was for you   Granny likes to crochet, and croquet, and quote Dear Abby   Granny causes road rage, in slow lanes, she's no Andretti   Granny's got the whole day, to go pray, for all her family   You've been hit by, you've been struck by, a smooth grandmamma      she came into the hallway, it was Sunday, had a snack made   Then the book of Revelation, was the topic, of conversation   Granny says you know babe, the Lord say, in verse 3:20   He's standing at the doorway, so don't waste, a moment honey   And you gotta go pray, or else babe, you won't gain entry   Then you told her OK, I want saved, I'll go pray Granny      Granny told you OK, first you tell Him, that you're sorry   Believe He died or your sins though   And accept, Him and repento -- Whammy!   He came into your heart then, you were prostrate, on the carpet   Then she ran you to the next room   You were sat down, there was more food   Granny karaokes, to old tapes, of Sandi Patty   You've been hit by, you've been struck by, a smooth grandmama      (BRIDGE)      Granny had a roast made, and potatoes, that were homemade   And she buys Poppin' Fresh Dough   So she baked you, some crescent rolls, lets eat!   You came into her apartment, and the blessings, only started   And then your Granny took and fed you   You were stuffed now; it was her food   Granny brought you cold grapes, and poached eggs, and bowls of candy   Granny brought you milkshakes, and fruitcake, keep Rolaids handy   Granny's artichokes make, your throat gag, so don't take any   And before you go babe, you must take, a roast beef sandwich