Well, he never got too lonely   And he never got too sad   But he never got too happy   And that's what's just too bad      He never reached much further   Than his lonely arms would go   He wore a seatbelt around his heart   And they called him Safety Joe      Safety Joe, Safety Joe   (Safety Joe, Safety Joe)   What do you say? What do you know?   If you don't loosen up the buckle   On your heart and start to chuckle   You're gonna die of boredom, Safety Joe      Now, Joe he lived in Baltimore   'Cause New York was too darn fast   He sometimes went down to Washington   Just to view our nation's past      He never ate his vegetables   'Cause they were just too darn chewy   And he never climbed much higher   Than the arch in old St. Louis      Safety Joe, Safety Joe   (Safety Joe, Safety Joe)   What do you say? What do you know?   If you don't loosen up the buckle   On your heart and start to chuckle   Well, you're gonna die of boredom, Safety Joe      Where's that mandolin?   It's the chorus      Joe gradually grew meaner   By not changin' his demeanor   But he never did nothin'   Too much for too long      Therefore his life never got much richer   Than the day they took that picture   In his birthday suit   On the day that he was born      Safety Joe, Safety Joe   (Safety Joe, Safety Joe)   What do you say? What do you know?   If you don't loosen up the buckle   On your heart and start to chuckle   Well, you're gonna die of boredom, Safety Joe   Well, you're gonna die of boredom, Safety Joe      That's golden