I come from south London I think I'm cool   I wear a cheap crombie and that's about all   I go down the pub with all the lads   Their wearing their chains that they got from their dads   But all I got was a rotten cheap chain   My wife's got in debt with the club book again      I'm a plastic gangster   They call me a crown and anchor      I asked one of my mates to get me some books   About the East End their gangs and their crooks   I bought a cheap car from one of the lads   He got it cheap from his car dealing dad   I'm in my new car, I'm driving it home   The next thing I know the engine has blown      I went down the West End, the local was drag   I had to pay a tenner to go with some bag   I took her home to her place I gave her some stick   The next thing I know the old bag was sick      I stay at home on Thursdays, minders on TV   I'm learning Cockney rhyming slang of to a tee   So when I go out on Fridays I know what to say   I wish I was like Arthur and get my own way.