The telephone, the telephone   I have an idea   Women always have ideas   Hello...      CHORUS   Here is Agamennon   here is      What? Wrong connection   This is...   I am a moralist   An anti-militarist   I am against duels   I cannot stand seeing   A fly in a rage   I cannot look at   A uniform or blood   That woman has seduced me   And now I am done for   Darling, where shall I    Hide you in a hurry?      CHORUS      I am coming   Directly from the trenches   And look forward   To a solemn luncheon   Oh, my nerves   I'm losing my mind   This damned telephone   Spoils my favorite position   And now I can start   Writing poetry again