Never been near a university, never took a paper or a learned   degree, and some of your friends think that's stupid of me, but it's   nothing that I care about.   Well I don't know how to tell the weight of the sun, and of   mathematics well I want none, and I may be the Mayor of Simpleton, but   I know one things and that's I love you. When their logic grows cold   and all thinking gets done, you'll be warm in the arms of the Mayor of   Simpleton.   I can't have been there when brains were handed round (please be   upstanding for the Mayor of Simpleton), or get past the cover of your   books profound (please be upstanding for the Mayor of Simpleton), and   some of your friends thinks it's really unsound that you're ever seen   talking to me.   Well I don't know how to write a big hit song, and all crossword   puzzles well I just shun, and I may be the Mayor of Simpleton, but I   know one thing and that's I love you.   I'm not proud of the fact that I never learned much, just feel I   should say, what you get is all real, I can't put on an act, it takes   brains to do that anyway. (And anyway...)   And I can't unravel riddles problems and puns, how the home computer   has me on the run, and I may be the Mayor of Simpleton, but I know one   thing and that's I love you (I love you).   If depth of feeling is a currency (please be upstanding for the   Mayor of Simpleton), then I'm the man who grew the money tree (no   chain of office and no hope of getting one), some of your friends are   too brainy to see that they're paupers and that's how they'll stay.   Well I don't know how many pounds make up a ton of all the Nobel   prizes that I've never won, and I may be the Mayor of Simpleton, but I   know one things and that's I love you. When all logic grows cold and   all thinking gets done, you'll be warm in the arms of the Mayor of   Simpleton. You'll be warm in the arms of the Mayor of Simpleton.   You'll be warm in the arms of the Mayor. (Please be upstanding for   the Mayor of Simpleton.)