I love to, love to go to parties   I head straight for the bathroom   And sit there for an hour   I love to, I love to   Listen to the queue forming   I rise to meet them, the men have all departed   The women are empowered   With a strange and brutal hatred for me   Me the big operator   I can be a funny guy   A smooth manipulator in an Hawaiian tie      CHORUS:   I love you, I love you, and this is why:   I'm a 1 drink dreamer (x3)   And a 10 or 11 drink clown   I'm a 1 drink dreamer (x3)   And a 10 or 11 drink clown.      I eat the crackers, tell a couple of Jewish jokes   When they don't get 'em I say:   You gotta be Jewish folks   Gotta be Jewish   Patient, patient is there a patient in the house?   My son's a doctor, he's a doctor      1 drink little whisky mack if it's winter   2 drinks gimme 'bucca straight up   3 drinks I'm really dreaming now   4 5 6 I'm half a clown   7 drinks it's time for a little chatter to the shikse on my left   8 drinks a rather rapid white wine   9 10 no it doesn't really matter to a raging clown      CHORUS