St. Peter perusing the old Pearly Gates   Working the swing shift, Two Thousand and Eight   It was slow for a Monday, five minutes to nine   There were only two spirits in line      The first began knocking, St. Peter said, "Come   Tell me what did you do down on Earth there my son?"   "I was a preacher, my word was the Lord's   And I lectured for decades how God I adored."      "Come on right in, friend, you're most welcome here   We’ve built you a cabin just off to the rear   And when you've settled in here's a coupon that's good   For a nice cotton robe and a staff made of wood."      So then came the second, a short balding man   With an old blue beret and two wrinkled old hands   St. Peter began with his questions again   "Tell me, what did you do in the world of men and women?"      "For the last thirty years sir, I drove a big cab   On the streets of Manhattan, I'd zoom and I'd gab"   St. Peter said “Sir, you need say nothing more"   And quite quickly relinquished the keys to the door      Come on right in, friend, you don’t have to wait   We've built you a palace right by the front the gate   With a big fireplace so you’ll never get cold   And a set of silk suits and a staff made of gold."      But the preacher who'd gone in before him caught word   Of this opulent dwelling and then when he heard   Of the difference in garments and staves, he was furious   Perplexed and bewildered and partially curious      "Tell me, why does this chauffeur get all these fine gifts here   When I served the Lord and all he did was shift gears?"   And here was the reply that St. Peter made   "When you preached, people slept   When he drove, people prayed!'