Well, I don't care if it rains or freezes,   as long as i got my plastic Jesus   riding on the dashboard of my car.      Through all trials and tribulations,   and my travels through the nations   with my plastic jesus I'll go far.      Oh Plastic Jesus, Plastic Jesus   Riding on the Dashboard of my car      I'm afraid he'll have to go   his magnet's ruined my radio   If I have a wreck he'll leave a scar      Riding down the good ol' fair(?)   With his nose up in the air   a wreck may be ahead, but we don't mind      Trouble come and he don't see   those pictures i don't need   and any other thing that lies behind      (chorus)      Though the sun shines on his back   makes him peal and chip and crack   (?????????????) keeps them up to par      When pedestrians try to cross   I let them know who's boss   never blow the horn or give them warning      I ride all over town   trying to run them down   and tell them that they'll never see the morning      (chorus)      His Halo fits just right   And I use it for a sight   they'll scatter all, they'll splatter near and far.