Long in the tooth   Long in the tooth   I'm lookin' round the corner   And I'm long in the tooth   Waiter, hey check please   In the corner booth   I'm feelin' rather long in the tooth      Time is a loser, boozer, schnoozer   He carried up and married up   A midwest hoosier   Coffee beans   Fax machines   Playin' like a schmoozer   He's gettin' rather long in the tooth      Oysterhead, Zeppelin Led   Shoulda heard what granny said   Paco de Lucia never seen a man like Flouncin' Fred   Wrapped up   Tapped out   Crapped on   Bled   He's feelin' rather long in the tooth      Long in the tooth   Long in the tooth   Mother Nature's greedy when   You're long in the tooth   You ain't afraid of dyin'   But you're terrified of youth   You must be gettin' rather   Long in the tooth      Long in the tooth   Long in the tooth   If you're watchin' Price is Right   Then you're damn long in the tooth   I sold of my rebellion   For a pocket full of couth   'Cause I'm gettin' rather   Long in the tooth      Stompin' Tom says "Hey, hi, heave, hi, ho" (3x)      Long in the tooth   Long in the tooth   Well I'll take mine dirty   With a splash of Vermouth   I kinda like bein' long in the tooth