I judge by what she's wearing   Just how many heads I'm tearing   Off of assholes coming on to her   Each night seems like it's getting worse      And I wish she'd take the night off   So I don't have to bite off   Every asshole coming on to her   It happens every night she works      They'll go and ask the DJ   And find out just what she would say   If they all tried coming on to her   Don't think, no, it's never gonna work      They think they'll get inside her   With every drink they buy her   As they all try coming on to her   This time somebody's getting hurt      Here comes the next contestant   Is that, your hand, on my, girlfriend?   Is that, your hand?   I wish you'd do it again (I'd watch you leave here limping)   And I wish you'd do it again (I'd watch you leave here limping)   There goes the next contestant      And I even feel the ladies   They're cool but twice as crazy   Just as bad for coming on to her   Don't think, no, it's never gonna work      And each time she bats an eyelash   Somebody's grabbing her ass   Everyone keeps coming onto her   This time somebody's getting hurt      Here comes the next contestant   Is that, your hand, on my, girlfriend?   Is that, your hand?   I wish you'd do it again (I'd watch you leave here limping)   And I wish you'd do it again (I'd watch you leave here limping)   There goes the next contestant      I'm hating what she's wearing   Everybody here keeps staring   Can't wait 'til they get what they deserve   This time somebody's getting hurt      Here comes the next contestant   Is that, your hand, on my, girlfriend?   Is that, your hand?   I wish you'd do it again (I'd watch you leave here limping)   And I wish you'd do it again (I'd watch you leave here limping)   And I wish you'd do it again (Each night seems like it's getting worse)   And I wish you'd do it again (This time somebody's getting hurt)   There goes the next contestant