Happy birthday    You're halfway to sixty    You have no land of your own    A job you despise and a lover that's mean       And you started noticing a disturbing thing    Birds eating other birds just beyond the screen    So you packed up your things    And you hopped on the freeway, headed east    And you drove for eight days, aimlessly       Telling yourself to be humble    Singing yourself to be free    Being full aware that it's a middle-aged crisis type thing       And you drove until you saw a sign for a town called Luckey    Spelled L-U-C-K-E-Y    Where the sugar towers rise to line and meet the streets    Checked into a motel, slept on cardboard sheets    That covered the blood-stained mattress underneath    Went to the local bar and you got yourself a drink       Telling yourself to be humble    Singing yourself to be free    It's a middle-aged crisis type thing       It was the most rag-tag group you had ever seen    A splendid man with a moustache on both sides, nothing in-between    Looking like a preacher’s son who had given into the devil-worshipping scene    He was a real looker and he bought you a drink    And you proceeded to tell him everything    And you were getting a bit hysterical it seemed    And you laughed like a carburetor and then you screamed    All the doubt and the disbelief       Telling yourself to be humble    Singing yourself to be free    It's a middle-aged crisis type thing       And he told you how he came to be    As an altar boy by his father's knees    And how he came to lose his faith    There was no touching but advances were made    And his father's hand in slow motion, it was approaching him    And the doubt and disbelief crept over his young heart like the black ocean       A stormcloud, a hurricane if you will    A stormcloud, a hurricane       Telling yourself to be humble    Singing yourself to be free    It's a middle-aged crisis type thing       Go home, lady, find yourself happy    It's just a middle-aged crisis type thing    It's a middle-aged crisis type thing    It's a middle-aged crisis type thing    It's a middle-aged crisis type thing    It's a middle-aged crisis type thing    It's a middle-aged crisis type thing