If there's a single group of people who are underappreciated more than any other group of people, it has to be single parents. While everyone knows being a parent is hard, being a single parent tends to be even harder. Not only do you have to play the roles of both parents, but you're financially responsible for a set of bills that are usually paid by two incomes. Here are six of the most common single parent struggles with tips and strategies on how to overcome them.
1. The Financial Challenges. When you have two people paying a mortgage of $1,400 or more a month, it doesn't seem like that big of a deal. However, when one person is responsible for that kind of monthly payment, it becomes a big deal indeed. If you're having a hard time making your monthly housing payment, try downsizing to a smaller home, or if that's not possible, refinance over a longer period of time (or at a lower interest rate, if possible).
Make sure you do what you can to cut your other monthly expenses as well. Clip coupons and shop the sales at your local grocery store, get an all-in-one phone, cable and high-speed Internet plan and try shopping Goodwill stores for your household needs. Believe it or not, Goodwill isn't just about used clothing. Stores donate brand new items to the Goodwill center and you can get some really helpful household items for very little money. Even inexpensive computers for young children can be found there.
2. Finding Competent Childcare. Many single parents are at the mercy of the childcare opportunities available in their area. No one wants to leave her child in a childcare center that is anything but the best. The problem is that the best is also usually the most expensive. Call the different childcare centers in your area and compare charges and services offered. Ask each one for references and check to see if there are any financial assistance opportunities available like reduced price lunches.
3. Gender Issues. A mom who is a single parent may have a hard time teaching her sons about the things a dad would normally cover and a single father may have a hard time discussing female issues with his daughters. If there isn't a parental figure for your child to discuss gender-related issues with, you should enlist the help of a favorite aunt or uncle or a close family friend to act as a "surrogate parent" for your child. It may be easier for your child to open up to this other significant adult.
4. The World On Your Shoulders. When there's only one parent in the household, all of the family responsibilities lay on that person's shoulders. Cleaning the house, cooking meals, keeping up the yard, paying the bills, keeping an eye on the kids and all of the other parental responsibilities are the sole responsibility of that parent. It's easy to see that every single parent needs a break every so often. Make sure you take a break to revive yourself and re-energize. Even if it's just sending the kids to a sitter for a few hours, take that time to catch up on your reading, watch a favorite movie or just relax to soothing music.
5. Feeling Lost and Alone. Many single parents find themselves feeling isolated at one point or another. They don't really relate to singles without children because single parents have an entirely different set of priorities and responsibilities. If you find yourself feeling a bit lonely and you want to communicate with people who can relate to what you're going through, look into joining a nearby support group for single parents. Besides just chatting with other adults and exchanging thoughts and ideas, you may meet a new friend and enlarge your social circle.
6. Introducing Your Child to Those You are Dating. Having an array of boyfriends or girlfriends running in and out of your child's life isn't good for anyone. Many single parents are confused as to when a significant other should be introduced to your child. While it's never good to hide a growing relationship from your child, watch that they don't become emotionally involved with someone you're dating unless you really think the relationship is going somewhere. At that time you can plan outings together and involve the child in the relationship on a deeper level. You don't want to run the risk of your child getting hurt should they become attached to a person you're dating and the relationship doesn't work out. Sometimes it happens, but try to minimize the revolving door.
It is said that if a child has one stable adult in their lives who they can depend on, they will be ok. You can be that person for your child.
Children With Single Parent
Each child is unique and responds in a different manner in different situations. Single parenting deeply effects their emotions, so it is the duty of all parents to act in a way, which is better for the future of our kids. The idea is to act and not to react. So lets find out how the life of our off springs is affected by our actions.
Being a parent we should be well conversant with the stress triggers of our offsprings as they vary with age and personality. Every child responds to a situation in its own way. One kid may take a situation very seriously whereas the other may not react at all. Similarly toddlers, adolescents and younger kids face stress triggers differently. Single parents can only help themselves and their children if they know their way well.
Teenagers have complex requirements, which are not easy to meet as a sole parent. Being the only parent you lack the support of your partner. In absence of mothers all girls find their dads inexperienced to deal with their day-to-day problems. Single dads are often blamed for being insensitive, by teenage girls particularly on dating issues. Being a single father you have to make them understand that when you ask to invite her boyfriend home before going out together, itis obviously not an intrusion in her life. Rather it is to know whether it is safe for her going out with that particular person or not. This happens because that dad knows about teenage boys as he was a boy himself once and all dads whether single or not must look after the safety of their daughters. Every now and then curfew becomes an issue but they are to be explained that these check and balances depend upon how dependable she is.
Similarly the relation between teenage sons and their single mums is not without problems. This relation and emotions are at full swing in this relationship. As the boys grow up they usually become taller than their mothers because of the testosterone surge at this age. At the age of 16 boys may be up to 6 ft tall whereas most moms are not. As this happens the boys try to take charge within the house defying their mothers as parent. At this point the mothers need to be determined to keep their dominant rule and exercise their authority. If you are firm you can dictateand command the boys to follow rules. They need to remain in their rooms if they cannot control themselves till the time they are normal again. Similarly it is not advisable and safe for your teenager to drive in an angry mood, this may prove harmful.
When you deal with your child's emotions as the only parent it may be very tiring but to keep you household peaceful and smooth running you have to explain to your children that it is YOU who is in charge and emotions are part of everyday life but that they have to keep them under control.
Both Karen Fusco & Jennifer A. Gardner are contributors for EditorialToday. The above articles have been edited for relevancy and timeliness. All write-ups, reviews, tips and guides published by EditorialToday.com and its partners or affiliates are for informational purposes only. They should not be used for any legal or any other type of advice. We do not endorse any author, contributor, writer or article posted by our team.
Karen Fusco has sinced written about articles on various topics from Family, Fitness and Family. Karen Fusco is co-founder of which supports Busy Moms with free gift ideas and helpful tips to meet the challenges of motherhood. SilkBow is the perfe. Karen Fusco's top article generates over 8100 views. to your Favourites.
Jennifer A. Gardner has sinced written about articles on various topics from Parenting, Family and Parenting. Discover more help on at. Jennifer A. Gardner's top article generates over 8100 views. to your Favourites.
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