A breakup is known to be one of the most difficult experiences we can go through and for better or for worse it usually happens to everyone at one point or another. If you still have feelings for the man you want back and he hasn't abused you or treated you without respect, there is a good point to take up the getting your ex boyfriend back route.

Here's what you need to keep in mind on the way.

Even if you are heartbroken and confused, there is some hope to come your way... If you develop the right mindset and follow the right plan, you will arrive at a much better position to begin the process of healing and approaching him back, than if you let your impulses guide you. During an emotional turmoil your own instincts might turn into your worst enemy and mistakes are almost programmed.

1) To break out of the "vicious circle" your first step is to step back and see how your ex actually sees you... You must avoid clinging on to him with all your power and pressuring him, because that's almost a sure-fire way to drive pretty much any man away. Men are really programmed to reject neediness and desperate behavior, because they don't want to have a woman who can't stand on her own feet and who begs him to return.

Here some signs for being desperate... calling your ex multiple times a day, writing him text messages without end, reasoning, begging and repeating how much you really love him... All of those will not help for getting your ex boyfriend back. He will not take a woman, just because he feels sorry for her.

2) In order to deal better with your own emotions and get step 1) better under control, you should also eliminate all contacts with your ex for approximately one month after the breakup. By doing so, you will send him the "gift" of missing you and he will be intrigued about you much more strongly. To him this behavior will be almost shocking and very unexpected and will put you in more respectable position.

The time off you will have from your ex will also help you gain control over yourself, reevaluate the relationship and see it with a clear head. Acting towards your ex will fall much more naturally then and you will not lose control easily.

In a moment of pain sometimes a talk with a real person and friend who will understand you is what you will need. Therefore get together with friends that understand you as much possible and let them know how you feel. Only, don't let your ex know how you feel or even mutual friends of both of you.

3) You need to be honest with yourself and search for the real reason for your breakup and then do something about it. There is a particular underlying reason for your breakup although you might not instantly see it. Well, find it!

If he broke up with you there is a good chance that something on your side needs change, so be honest with it and be prepared to really change it. Needless to say that going back to the same relationship without taking a different attitude is not going to work long term.

I am suspecting that going through one whole month without contacting your ex will not be a "piece of cake" for you. It never is... However, once you have managed, you will be in a much better position to do anything from here, and now is also the time to contact your ex boyfriend again and show him that you did not let yourself "go down".

Talk to him very casually and with a positive and bright attitude (this equals to attraction). Don't mention anything about the relationship at this first meeting/call, but give as a reason some positive development that you recently experienced, that you wanted to share with him soon. Follow your plan and be wary of falling back into needy or panicky behavior.

Getting your ex boyfriend back has to begin somewhere... and you can use the steps covered above as a great opening move. There is more to the whole system, but these steps apply to anyone.