Maintaining a high level of self esteem can help a child or teen find the courage to stand up against the crowd for what they believe and say no with courage and power. Self-esteem is what helps us all hold our heads up high and believe that we can accomplish anything we set out to do. All wonderful traits we want to instill in our kids.
Unfortunately for far too many teens, sudden changes in their bodies and emotions can leave them scared, confused and frightened. Many lose their ability to feel good about themselves and begin to make bad choices that can adversely affect their futures.
How can you, as a parent, tell the difference between normal teenage angst and serious self-esteem issues? Watch for these important clues:
-A sudden change in the way they look and take care of their appearance.
A child who has always been meticulous about the way they dressed and looked, and who suddenly takes no care in themselves or their clothing may be adopting an attitude of "I'm always a mess anyway so no one will notice."
-Exhibits an extreme need to be perfect.
Children who feel that they must be perfect at everything often do so as a way to hide all the things they perceive that they can't do correctly. Being studious is one thing, but if your child suddenly exhibits an unnatural need for perfection, or has a hard time dealing with even the smallest amount of criticism; it may be a sign of trouble.
-An inability to try new things.
It's natural for children and teens to want to try new things and have new experiences. A child who consistently shies away from anything but the norm, may not have the confidence to believe that they can succeed.
-Constant belittling.
A child with a good sense of self esteem is can easily interact with their peers and accept life's challenges without making it a big deal, while children with low self esteem will constantly belittle themselves even when they do succeed.
What if you recognize these signs in your own child? What can you do to help build your child's self esteem? Follow these tips:
-Watch what you say.
Be gentle with any criticism and watch for opportunities to offer thoughtful (and truthful) praise.
-Be a positive role model.
Don't be too hard on yourself either. If you expect too much from yourself, your children are apt to follow your lead and mirror your behavior.
-Be affectionate with your child.
Give your kids lots of hugs and praise. Let them know that they are worthy of your love and attention.
-Make your child feel safe and nurtured.
Take the time to make him or her feel important.
Low Self Esteem In Children
One of the most important jobs of parents is to be able to build self esteem in a child. This will allow the person to succeed in the future regardless of the career chosen.
Since children look up to the parents as role models, it is only best to start from the very top. Many of these people have to work for a living to put food on the table. When the topic of work comes around and the children are present, it is always best to think and say something positive so that the children will inherit the same attitude when it comes to school.
In the same manner, when parents help the children with the homework, it is perfectly all right to help do some of it to make the person understand and then let the kid work on the rest. This should be double check later on to ensure the rest of the assignment is correct which will surely pay off when the report card comes in.
Studies have shown that getting a child into sports can also help build self esteem. It wouldn't hurt to try something new such as soccer or basketball which are team sports that will foster teamwork and camaraderie.
If the child is not doing well compared to the others, perhaps it is time to buy a goal or a mini court and have this installed at home. Playing with the kids and having fun at the same time may be the extra practice that is needed in order for the player to do better in the game.
Not everyone is talented in sports. It is a good thing there are other skills the child can participate in to boost self esteem. There are music lessons using various instruments and art classes using paint, oil or charcoal. The child has to start somewhere and who knows, this could be the person's passion in the future.
There is another way to boost the child's self esteem. This involves doing something that has never been done before while spending some quality time. Father and son can go through a different bike trail in the woods or have mom and daughter bake a few goodies in the kitchen.
There is a chance the group could get lost or the things that come out in the oven are burned. The point is, the child will not know what will happen without trying and part of self confidence is being able to take a risk and becoming a better person no matter what happens in the end.
When this has been developed, this is the time that the child should be allowed to make some choices. Parents should be supportive regardless of the outcome but should always give words of caution and wisdom.
After all, there are risks worth taking and there are others that are not worth it. Knowing the difference between what is right or wrong and being able to understand and weigh the consequences is another important lesson in life.
Both Matthew Hick & Sam Smith are contributors for EditorialToday. The above articles have been edited for relevancy and timeliness. All write-ups, reviews, tips and guides published by EditorialToday.com and its partners or affiliates are for informational purposes only. They should not be used for any legal or any other type of advice. We do not endorse any author, contributor, writer or article posted by our team.
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